Aurora 2: The Gift
by RachelJLewis
Summary: Part 2 of 5: Ness Masen is spending Christmas in Britain with her friends Jess and Dan. They're having a very British Christmas, with lots of turkey and tinsel. Odd, but Ness never remembered anyone mentioning that tragedy was to be part of it...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One: Family Photograph**

In my wallet, stored secretly behind the picture of my imaginary dead parents, is another photograph. A picture that if I were being sensible; I wouldn't be carrying around with me. But I can't help it. It's one of my most treasured possessions and I don't want to leave it in the photograph album hidden under the floor of my bedroom. It was taken on my birthday in September; my eighteenth or my seventh, depending on which side of my life you live and it's a candid shot of a group of eighteen people.

We were trying to get a family picture; having all of us in the same place at the same time was getting more and more unusual. But two seconds before the shutter clicked, Emmett told the most appalling joke and the camera caught everyone, even my Dad, falling about laughing.

Everything that I love about my family is present in this picture. The people, the love, the unlikely bonds, the fun and the sheer unpredictability of life when your family unit consists of eleven vampires, four humans, two human vampire hybrids and a guy who can turn into a wolf.

The people in this picture are so very dear to me. But it wasn't always that way. I spent a large part of last year fighting with most of them and trying to split my life into two separate parts. My vampire side I pushed into a closet and turned the key. I embraced my humanity and like most people who try to divorce themselves, I wound up in one heck of a mess.

I am a human vampire hybrid and I'm slowly learning to manage the balance between the vampire me and the human me. The vampire me is Renesmee Cullen. The human me is Vanessa Masen; but I have settled on a middle ground and I'm known simply as Ness to everyone. You can Google Ness Masen, I'll show up in all the places you'd expect me to and I can social network with the best of them. You won't find a trace of Ness Cullen though. She is mythology.

The relationships and bonds in this photograph are a little complicated, but while I have it out I'll do my best to explain them. It's important that you know who is who in my life and that what you see is not what you get. For example, I may look exactly like any other eighteen year old girl, but I've only needed seven years to get this far. We hybrids don't exactly follow the rules of nature.

So that's me in the centre, the girl with the long bronze curly hair. The huge Quileute man I have my arms around is my Jake. In the human world he's the guy who runs the auto repair shop; but in my family he's the one who can turn into a wolf. He's also my boyfriend. Boyfriend doesn't _quite_ cover what he is to me; but we start having to use terms like destiny, predetermination and other words that can't really explain what's going on between us. But it's important that you know one thing; he's _mine. _In a _come-near-him-and-I'll-rip-your-head-off_ kind of a way. I think that pretty much sums it up.

The woman sat next to Jake and the guy sat next to her may look like my siblings but they're actually my parents, Edward and Bella Cullen. I'm sure you can see that my hair is the _exact _same shade as my Dad's and my face is the same shape as my Mom's. I have her brown eyes too, although you won't see that because she's a vampire now. She went through a lot to give birth to me and having seen it again more recently, I am totally in awe of her.

Things are great between the four of us now, but rewind five months and I hated the very sight of them, even Jake. I got myself lost in so very many ways and for a while I couldn't think straight about things. Add to that the effects of another family trait I inherited - my Mom's stubbornness - and for a while I had the human teenager thing down to perfection. Dad had his own difficulties going on, which nearly resulted in the first ever vampire divorce. Thank goodness we sorted that out.

My parents and my (now) boyfriend are back in my life, but it does come at a price. I may be humanly eighteen and legally an adult, but Dad is not ready to give up being a Dad, so that means he's close and unless I get ten miles away from him, he can hear my thoughts. Yeah, you learn not to think about certain stuff until he goes out of town. It took a while to get the hang of it. I lost count of the number of growls, but I did clock two hundred and forty seven text messages asking me to cut it out. What can I say? I'm a girl in love with a handsome guy! You're not telling me he doesn't have those same thoughts about Mom… and we've wandered into territory that no child wants to think about, so let's move on!

Sat next to me is the Forks Chief of Police; I have friends in high places. To the rest of the world, Charlie Swan is looking after me whilst I finish up High School. The story is that my (imaginary) parents were killed in a car crash fifteen months ago. The authorities tracked down my cousin (Edward) and I went to live with him, his wife and baby daughter. But three adults and a baby in a small house didn't work, so Bella's Dad invited me to come live with him, which I did.

On the surface, it's an entirely plausible scenario and it's working. Grampa knows what I am, what his daughter now is and all about the vampires and wolves that inhabit this small corner of the Pacific Northwest. He, however, is just your regular human. There's nothing special about him, other than being my Grampa and therefore a completely awesome guy.

There is, however, something special about a woman not in this picture, Grampa's girlfriend, Heather Scott. By profession she's the Minister of the local Baptist Church; but other than that the Cullens haven't quite worked her out yet. She appears to be part angel and for now she remains firmly on the _rest of the world_ side of my line. But things are going well for Grampa and Heather, so at some point we'll need to decide whether she crosses the line or not. Having an angel in the mix could be fun; although quite how she'll deal with what we are will be interesting to discover.

Sat next to Grampa is Jake's Dad, Billy. He's not strictly speaking part of our family, but he's as dear to us as if he were. He's equally in love right now. He and his beloved Maggie are close to setting a date for their wedding. Billy himself doesn't change into a wolf, but he knows that Jake does and that he's not the only one. The wolves down on the La Push Reservation and the Cullen vampires didn't always have such an easy relationship; but Jake and I being together meant that things had to be re-evaluated.

Standing behind the sofa are more of my vampire family. On the right, the blond haired man is Carlisle. He's the head of our family. He may look in his early twenties, but he's over three hundred and sixty years old. Next to him is his wife Esmé, but I call her Grandma. Stood next to her are my aunts and uncles: Emmett and Rose, Jasper and Alice.

With the exception of me and someone else I'll introduce shortly, everyone else chooses to belong to our family. They all have their own talents and histories that they bring to the mix: Alice can see the future, and Jasper can influence moods. Rose can fix anything with an engine and Emmett you'd want by your side in a fight. I love them so very much, but I do wish Alice would cut me some slack on clothes. Yes, I do like wandering around looking like a hobo if truth be told. There's no point dressing up just to end up with half the forest smeared on, or attached to me. My talent is attracting dirt. I also have the ability to let other people see my thoughts, by touching their face or neck. I don't use it very often these days. I would use it more with Jake, but my phone seems to go off a lot when I do.

Sat in front of the sofa are the more recent members of our family. In front of my parents are Dan and Jane. Dan is in my class at school; he's entirely human but has fallen in love with a vampire and what a vampire! Jane spent twelve hundred years as an enforcer for the Volturi; the police officers of the vampire world. That was until she came to dispense justice to me after a slip-up (the less said about that the better) and fell head over heels in love with Dan. He fell head over heels in love right back and it wasn't fun trying to keep those two apart.

I was fearful that Jane may have him for lunch or that Dan might freak out at what she was. Either way he was dead. In the end, with everything else falling apart in my life, I gave in and let them fall into each other's arms. Amazingly, Dan didn't become lunch or freak out. In fact, he seemed entirely unfazed by it and more concerned that it severely narrowed down restaurant opportunities. They got married a few weeks ago. The weekend after his and his twin sister Jess's eighteenth birthday, all of us got on a plane one Friday and flew over to Italy for the weekend. There, in a chapel, deep in the heart of the Volturi fortress, someone timeless and older than any building around her, bound herself to someone his sister described as a 'spotty herbert from Grasmere'. But then again, Jess always does have a phrase for every occasion.

That's Jess there, sat in front of me; the blonde girl who looks like she's ironed her hair. She's my best friend and now part of my family. She too has fallen in love with a vampire; although unlike Jane and Dan, I didn't see that one coming. She managed to find one in a club in Port Angeles. Scared of what her friends might say, she kept him out of everyone's way, which was a sensible precaution. Plus, he wasn't entirely sure what I was, so there was a lot of secrecy on both sides.

The day I finally met Jess's vampire boyfriend Will, was also the day I discovered that she was pregnant by him. I've already told you that I didn't give my Mom an easy pregnancy, but Jess was in good hands and all the experience my family had gained with Mom was brought to bear on Jess. In July she gave birth to Ben, the boy sat on Will's lap. He's the most gorgeous little boy, although there's a chance we could be biased. As you can see, even at two months old in this picture he looks almost two years old. He's another hybrid.

Like her twin brother, Jess is still entirely human and both she and Dan are staying that way for now. We have a final year of High School to complete and they've both decided to wait a while before they too make the transition to being vampires.

Will is twenty five, so Jess is mulling over the idea of going to University. Jane got frozen in time at fourteen so of the two of them, I'm guessing Dan will make the change first.

Right at the end there, sat next to Will, is Daniel. Jess calls him our rescue vampire because that's what we did, we rescued him. Things got so bad last summer that I ran away to San Francisco. I was picked up by Daniel, who worked for the vampire who controls the city. I say worked but that's not entirely correct. Daniel was the lowest of the low; the gopher, the dogsbody, the _Dobby the House Elf_ figure. But he put his life on the line trying to save me and in return, my Dad pieced him back together and invited him to see a different side of vampire life; a life where people cared about you.

Daniel's in transition himself, changing from a traditional vampire to one that chooses to live as we do – as a 'vegetarian'. We consume animal blood not human blood and that's how we manage not to tear each other or our human family members apart. Daniel has a daughter, Madison, who is still in San Francisco with his former wife. She's nine years old and she has no clue what happened to her Daddy, who went missing on her sixth birthday. It's his biggest wish to find some way of being a father to her.

Daniel's sweet on our History teacher, Stephanie Chambers. It's going to be difficult for him to try and cope with transitioning and trying to date Stephanie, but he's giving it a go. It's still early days and Dad and he have concocted a mad cover story, which Jess laughed out loud at.

"She's not daft, Edward! She's an intelligent woman, she'll see right through that." Jess chuckled. Dad, however was optimistic that it would work. Jess looked somewhat perplexed at the stack of equipment they'd bought for it and then rolled her eyes when Will signed up to help out. "Pfft!" She grumbled. "One sniff of space and you're there. Well I suppose all that Star Trek watching you've done will come in useful."

"It's Astronomy classes Jess, we're not joining Starfleet." Grinned Will.

"Well whatever the hell you've got planned for her, you're all a load of Space Cadets." Jess rolled her eyes and sauntered off, to find out what mischief Ben had managed to get into with Jasper.

Last year we were all together for Christmas. We spent it in Denali in Alaska and some not very nice things happened to me there. So this year, I'm determined it's going to be better. But we're not together. Grandma, Carlisle, Rose, Emmett, Jasper and Alice have gone to Denali again. Daniel's staying in Forks to keep an eye on things. I guessed those 'things' included Miss Chambers, when Rose turned to my Dad, sighed and said,

"Oh fabulous, it's you all over again."

Grampa and Billy are also in Forks and they're spending Christmas with Maggie and Heather. Grampa has promised Mom that he won't try and cook.

I am spending Christmas with Jess and Dan and their parents, Susie and Brian Taylor. We don't travel light these days. Jess does not go anywhere without Will and Ben, Dan will not leave Jane and I can't possibly spend Christmas apart from Jake. So they're with us too. Dad and Mom do not want to spend Christmas away from me and as last year was such a disaster, we're hoping that spending Christmas overseas might work out better.

So here I am, in Britain for Christmas. I'm in the small Cumbrian town of Grasmere in the north west of England, where Jess and Dan used to live. I'm in a pub right now. More specifically, I'm in the ladies' washroom checking to see if there are any phone messages from Jake. They're on their way up and I can't wait 'til he gets here. While Dad's not within ten miles of me, I'm making the most of letting my head think about Jake all it wants to and about what it wants to. I'm enjoying it!

I feed the picture of my real family back behind the photograph of my imaginary family and pick up my drink again. Jess bought it for me; it's her drink of choice. It's got W-K-D on the label, it's got vodka in it and it's bright blue. Anyone who knows my track record with vodka might be wondering why I'm drinking it again and in such close proximity to humans. To which all I can reply is, 'when in Rome…'

Drinking Coke tonight would be drawing serious attention to myself. And you know that any girl, even a half vampire girl, wants to blend in.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: Snow Angels**

"_So__ here __it__ is __Merry __Christmas,__ ev__'__rybody__'__s __having __fun!_" Jess bellowed the song at a girl stood across from her. My best friend was incredibly drunk. Dan was in the worst state I'd ever seen him in and even I was a little unsteady. But we were in no different condition to anyone else in the pub. Jess and Dan had been reunited with their former classmates and it felt like every single one of them, was trying to stand in the same square foot of space around me.

I knew why that was. After the Denali incident last Christmas, part of my vampire self that I'd previously had a choice over, had been left permanently 'switched on.' I was slightly more vampire than I used to be and people reacted to that. Girls wanted to be friends with me and boys wanted to date me. Sometimes it was the other way around. My most frequently uttered line was becoming 'you're nice, I like you, but I'm really not interested.'

Around one hundred people were packed into a space that would comfortably hold sixty. It was hot, it was noisy and there was a very great danger of getting tangled in the Christmas decorations which hung from the ceiling. The bar staff were decorated too, wearing either Santa hats or garlands of tinsel wound around their heads. Some were wearing tree baubles for earrings. Every surface had something glittery stuck to it and even the beer pumps had tinsel garlands wound around them.

Although I was drinking vodka, I had learned my lesson from the last time. I wasn't going near anybody's neck. While the way to smell attractive to a vampire is to let your natural blood-scent come through, humans like to attract mates by drenching themselves in fragrances. So it was easy to be here, smelling as it did, like a cross between a brewery and a perfume counter. Besides, the only neck I wanted to be near was not here right now; but I'd see him later. My stomach tightened as I thought about _seeing __him __later_. I gave out a low growl, which was lost in the wall of sound around me.

Jess had all but forgotten I was here, but not in a malicious way. Her former best friend Gem was attached limpet-like to her side. Jess had tried to talk to me earlier, but Gem was immune to my vampire charms and as Jess drank more, she'd allowed Gem to take over. Apparently, I wasn't into vampires enough to be worth Gem's consideration. Jess's highly amused sniggering had been misconstrued by Gem, as Jess laughing at me. Jess and I both knew otherwise. But, 'her loss,' as Jess would say.

I was stood with another group of Jess's friends which included 'Freaky'. She wasn't actually called Freaky; her name was Fiona Sawbridge and it was her eclectic interests that had given her the nickname 'Freakosaurus.' That had been shortened to Freaky and there really wasn't a more suitable name for her. She was the personification of odd and looked like she was moments away from running off screaming. I could very well give her the biggest reason for doing just that if she knew what I was.

Freaky wasn't very talkative. I'd tried, but she was the kind of person only my Dad, with his mindreading abilities could get on with. While the other girls seemed to hang on my every word, Freaky stood in silence. If anything she looked fed up at times. Something was getting to her but she wasn't for saying what it was. She sipped on her drink. Where mine was blue, Freaky's was orange – it matched her hair.

I noticed Dan grinning at me from a little way away. I smiled and he came over. He elbowed his way through to me and brought his face down close to my ear. I caught the distinct aroma of beer as he spoke.

"You don't have a frigging clue what's going on, do you?" He swayed, cupping my shoulder with his hand to steady himself. "You might as well have pitched up on Mars."

I smiled and shook my head. I had to agree with him. I had never, in my seven years of life, experienced anything quite like this. All human life was here and it was out of its head on psychedelic-coloured alcohol.

"I'll come and rescue you. I'll just get Tom, hang on." Dan lurched off into the crowd, being waylaid by friends at every turn. In time he made his way back with Tom, who I'd met earlier. He was the first one to get my 'not interested' line tonight, but he didn't appear to have heard me.

Before Dan had moved to Forks, Tom had been his closest friend and the two of them were inseparable tonight. I understood that both Jess and Dan had had lives and friends before they met me; but I was feeling a bit jealous this evening. The alcohol wasn't helping and neither was being apart from Jake for two days. Across from me, Jess and Gem were leaping about to yet another Christmas song and in those heels, it looked like I could well be carrying Jess back with a sprained ankle.

Dan's arrival seemed to be just what Freaky needed. He said hello to her and she positively gushed in response, saying all of three words together.

"You look drunk!"

"Got to make the most of it. We live in the land of the free and also the land of inhuman licensing laws." He raised his pint of beer and looked at it with much the same desire as he did his wife. "Beer, oh how I love thee!"

Dan drank deeply from the glass. Behind him, Jess finally overbalanced on her four inch heels, fell backwards into a boy's lap and started laughing hysterically. Dan cast a look of disdain at his sister.

"Trollop." He muttered and Freaky giggled. I saw the tell-tale pink blush spreading across her cheeks. Oh, I wasn't completely clueless, I could tell when a girl fancied a guy and Freaky fancied Dan. Sadly, he was already spoken for. The unusual plaited silver ring he wore on the fourth finger of his left hand wasn't your classic wedding ring. And he was eighteen, so why would you think he was married anyway?

"So what's going on in Grocklemere these days, Freaks?"

Grocklemere was Dan's name for Grasmere. During the summer the town was a honey-pot location for tourists; eager to seek out the mountains, the nice town and the links to the Victorian poet William Wordsworth.

"Not much, all quiet on the western front. How's life in America? It must be exciting living there?"

Dan's eyes flicked to mine and several thousand unspoken words were present in them.

"No. Every bit as boring as this place, actually. But without the beer."

"But you're in a band?" She said. "Isn't that exciting? Don't you get to play some cool clubs?"

"Next year, possibly. We've got some gigs pencilled in for Seattle, but right now we're just playing locally."

Tom pulled open his shirt.

"He gave me a band t-shirt." The name of our band was emblazoned in dark blue lettering on a grey background.

"I want one!" Cried Freaky, she was positively animated now.

"I've got some back at the house. Come and get one tomorrow."

"Oh I can't. We're off down to my uncle's early tomorrow morning."

"I'll push one through the letterbox."

Dan went to turn to me to say something, but Freaky wasn't for letting him drop his attention from her.

"Hey, I can read palms now."

"Can you? That's cool." For Dan this was too good to miss and he stuck his free hand out to Freaky. She took hold of it as if she were handling a precious jewel. "So how long am I going to live, then?" Dan could not hide his amusement. His life expectancy was likely to be greater than anything Freaky might report.

"Looks fairly average to me."

Out of curiosity I glanced at my own hand. Did I dare put mine in front of her?

"Average?" He queried.

Freaky nodded. "You should see Gem's, it's phenomenally long." Freaky turned Dan's hand on the side and bent it a little. "You're going to have two children though."

Dan spluttered. "_Two_ children?"

"Yes, you have two lines on the side of your hand."

"Really?"

"Yes why? Don't you want any?"

"It wasn't something I was planning on, no." A wicked grin appeared on his face. "Do Ness's palm. How long's her life going to be and how many kids is she going to have?" Dan was sufficiently dismissive of Freaky's palm-reading to be unconcerned by what she might say about me.

I held my palm out to her. Freaky looked at it for a moment.

"Your life line's all over the place. It looks to be fairly average in length though. But, I can tell that your love life will be greatly influenced by fate. You're not going to have much say over what happens in your relationships."

Freaky didn't know it, but she had hit upon a truth. Dan's eyebrows shot up, concerned this may not have been a good idea. Freaky turned my hand to the side.

"You're going to have four children."

"Four?" Dan found this hilarious and his laughter attracted the attention of Jess, who staggered over to find out what was amusing her brother. He told her what Freaky had said.

"Four kids?" Jess cackled like a witch and thrust her own hand over to Freaky. "How many am I having?"

Freaky looked at it. "Just the one."

"Oh." Another truth and the disappointment in Jess's voice was tangible.

Freaky tried to mollify her. "But you're going to have a really long life. Look!" Freaky traced the life line on Jess's palm, "It almost stretches into infinity. You and Gem will outlive us all."

"That's good to know."

"I'm not living as long as you," said Dan. "Mine's average. Ness's is all over the place."

This comment seemed to amuse Jess.

The Jess here tonight was not the Jess I knew. She had dug out clothes from her 'previous life' and in them, blended seamlessly into the amorphous mass of black-clad girls. All of them had long hair, all of them had more eye make-up than Alice Cooper and all of them were completely obsessed by vampires.

In order to fit in again, Jess had been re-watching her once favourite TV show, _Vampire__Nights_. She'd stopped when she'd swapped lusting over a fictional vampire, for loving a real one. We'd spent the last few weeks watching it together, with Jess wondering how she ever liked it in the first place. Now she knew that vampire life really wasn't all that different to human life, she could see how idiotic it was and how easy it was for real vampires to avoid every cliché going. Jess understood that in her new life it was more important than ever to fit in, so as not to arouse suspicion of what her new life actually contained.

Jess had put in the study and once again could talk the talk with her friends. They, in turn, were happy that the Jess who'd gone to America was the same Jess who'd come back on this visit. Nothing could be further from the truth. This wasn't the real Jess Taylor; this was someone pretending to be her.

I knew for a fact that if she could, she'd be boring everyone to death with endless pictures of her son and tales of his exploits. She was a proud Mummy and who could blame her? Ben was absolutely gorgeous! Also, given half a chance, she'd love to tell everyone about Will, especially how she'd been attracted to him because he looked like Alric from _Vampire__Nights_; not realising that he had more in common with the fictional vampire than she'd bargained on. But tonight, Jess restricted herself to talking about TV shows, dancing to bad Christmas songs and consuming several too many drinks. Jess was going to pay for this in the morning.

I could imagine Will's amused face when he saw her. He'd seen Jess drunk for the first time at Dan and Jane's wedding reception, when she'd decided that the Volturi needed to lighten up a bit and had gone off in search of a karaoke unit. My Dad scooped her up and brought her back, something she wasn't happy about and had given him a piece of her mind. Jess had been completely oblivious to the dangers posed by the red-eyed vampires in the building. It was her saving grace that they were so stunned by the sight of a human lurching through the corridors, that they hadn't thought to regard her as food. Jess didn't have an ounce of fear or, it seemed, any respect for authority. There was an audible gasp when she told Marcus that he looked like a miserable old bugger. Not even her beloved Will was immune from her verbal gymnastics.

Here in the pub she wasn't in danger from anyone, but she was a danger to herself; especially having chosen to wear her cobweb design boots again. I'd definitely have to carry her back.

Jess drifted back over to the other girls who made up the 'Grasmere Coven'. I stared after them, still a bit jealous that I wasn't over there with her.

"You're a good singer, Ness." Said Tom.

"Huh? Oh, thanks."

"You sung in any other bands before?"

I shook my head. "No, just family stuff."

Tom Barrington was taller than Dan and a little more muscular. He had thick, brown hair that he periodically ran his hand through and eyes of the darkest brown. Tom was Jess's ex-boyfriend and she wasn't too keen to be around him again. Before we'd left Forks, she'd told me about him and showed me some pictures of when they were a couple.

"It's not that I don't like him, he's nice and we get on well; but speaking to him will feel like going behind Will's back. It's doubly awkward, because Tom's Mum is my Mum's best friend and they both want us to be together. I wouldn't be surprised if there's some strategic matchmaking going on while we're there, seeing as I apparently don't have a boyfriend."

There could be no acknowledgement of either Will or Jane in the public lives of Jess and Dan. As far as their parents were concerned, the twins weren't with anyone. It was just easier that way. My Mom, based on her experience of dating Dad, had advised them against it; especially as Susie Taylor was big on inviting people over for meals to get to know them.

Tom and I got talking and Dan made Freaky's night by talking to her. Tom was nice and very easy to get on with. I hated to admit it, but he was also very easy on the eye. Tom was the most attractive human I'd seen and I was liking the whole dark hair and dark eyes thing he had going on. He was also interesting to talk to. Being a friend of Dan's, he liked similar music to us and I found that there, we had a lot in common.

My subtle contemplations of Tom Barrington's features were suddenly interrupted by hysterical laughter from Jess. She grabbed Gem and pulled her over to us. She smacked Dan on the shoulder.

"The _Slug __and__ Lettuce_ has been done up. They've turned it into a theme pub! Guess what it is? Go on, guess!"

Dan shrugged his shoulders. "Dunno. It's in Bowness, so... sailing?"

"No!" Jess hopped from foot to foot. "Guess again!"

"Um… Poets?"

"No!"

"Hill walking?"

"No, it's nothing to do with touristy thing. It's to do with music and… stuff."

"Um… Rock?"

"No!"

"Disco?"

"No!"

"I give up. What is it?"

"It's a Goth-themed pub. And guess what it's called?" Jess was beside herself with excitement.

Dan seemed to twig something. "It's not?" He was amused.

"It _is_!"

"The… Vampire and Werewolf?"

"Yes!" Jess shrieked. "They're all planning to go over on the 26th we've _got_ to go!"

"It's just the _best_ place!" Said Gem. "Great music, fabulous decor and lots of dark corners to do dark deeds in. You _have_ to come. I know you don't do vampire stuff Dan, but this place is the business. _Everyone_ goes there, it's so cool."

Dan turned to me. "It sounds too good to miss. What do you think Ness?"

"Sounds good to me."

I had visions of Dan standing Jake and me under the pub sign and taking a photo. Not that Jake was a werewolf, but he was the closest thing to one. Jake. The mere thought of his name set up the ache in my chest again. I glanced at my watch, it was five past nine. They'd be here soon.

The Taylor family were renting a house at the far end of Easedale Road, but the rest of our family were renting Aysgarth House, at the opposite end of the same road. We were calling in after the pub closed and eleven o'clock could not come fast enough.

I glanced around the pub. On the far side, _BBC__News__24_ was playing on a muted TV. There were pictures of a lion pacing around in a cage. I swallowed against a sudden vampire thirst. Big cat, I'd not had that in months, not since my last weekend down at Goat Rocks. I'd hunted right before we came and there were enough sheep and cattle locally to keep me going until I could get out into the park again, but big cat was my favourite.

My eyes settled on Gem, she was the visual opposite of Jess. Gem had raven black hair that fell in glossy curls half way down her back. She too was dressed in black, but she had gone the extra mile and was wearing a velvet cloak. She was most definitely the ring-leader and I had already picked up on her other skill, as lead drama-queen. Gem didn't just walk into a room, she walked out onto a stage. How she and Freaky had ever hooked up as friends, I couldn't see. Perhaps like Jess and I in the early days, Gem gave Freaky some confidence.

It was at that point that Freaky said her goodbyes and left, gazing longingly at Dan. It gave Tom the opportunity to come and stand a little closer to me. I didn't object. As distractions went, he was a nice one.

On the stroke of eleven the three of us made our excuses and left. Dan opened the pub door and Jess squealed with delight.

"Snow!" She yelled.

While we had been in the pub, several inches had fallen. Jess pushed past Dan and stumbled out into it, lifting her arms in the air, tilting her chin towards the sky and opening her mouth to catch the huge snowflakes.

Dan and I followed her. She twirled around and inevitably she overbalanced and fell. I caught her.

"Thank you!" She slurred.

None of us had the right footwear for snow, so this was going to be an interesting half mile walk home. I think we'd take another route once we were clear of the main streets. The three of us linked arms, Dan and I supporting Jess between us. The roads were quiet and any sound was muffled by the falling snow. We came out onto the grassed area, opposite the start of Easedale Road and Jess suddenly bolted forward.

"Snow Angels!" She yelled; tripped over the kerb and fell face down into the snow-covered grass.

Dan and I picked her up and she was laughing like an idiot as she brushed herself down. She took a few steps forward and then lay down on her back in the snow. She brought both her arms up by her side and rhythmically opened and closed her legs; so that when she got up, there was the impression of an angel with outstretched wings in the snow.

"I shall call her Heather." She said. We all snickered. Jess grabbed me. "Come on Ness, you do some!"

I found a space, lay down in the snow and copied Jess's movements. By the side of me, Dan did the same and Jess moved elsewhere to start another one.

As we lay in the snow making angel after angel, I heard cars approaching. I turned my head to see two, big, blacked-out SUV's coming along the road. They turned into Easedale Road and straight into the drive of Aysgarth House.

Dan bolted upright. "Thank God for that!" He whispered and scrambled quickly to his feet. I got up and we hauled Jess back upright.

We set off across the grass to the house. Jess hadn't seen them arrive and was suddenly a little concerned at where we were going in such a hurry.

"Where's the fire?" She slurred.

"They're here. Surely you haven't forgotten about them, or did all your sense get replaced by blue WKD?"

She giggled. "I think I've had a bit too much to drink."

"A _bit_? A lot! Mind you, I don't think any of us can talk. Ness, you did well tonight. The trick must be not to kiss them, yes?"

It was my turn to laugh. "Oh I was checking out some tasty treats. I don't think anyone would have missed a few people in that crowd."

"I'll give you a list of acceptable casualties, Gem for one. She was a quantum leap worse than I remember. Every sentence is an Oscar-winning performance."

We reached the gates of the house, the drive curved round and opened out into a wide flat area, beyond which was an imposing grey-slate double-fronted Victorian villa. The curtains were already closed, but at an upstairs window I could see the shadow of a vampire flitting about.

We reached the door and Dan rang the bell. It was odd for us to have to do such a thing; usually doors were thrown open as we arrived. They couldn't not hear us walking over this gravel, even if it was buried under three inches of snow, it still crunched as we walked.

But finally, the door was opened and Dad was there. There was a smile on his face, but it didn't reach all the way to his eyes. I knew that something wasn't right.

"Dad?"

"Come in." He was falsely cheerful.

"Hey Edward." Said Dan as he walked past, slapping his hand on my Dad's shoulder. "Are you OK?"

"I'm fine. Have you had a good evening?"

"Yes, although Will's got trouble." Dan gestured his thumb to Jess behind him.

"Edward!" The drunken Jess flung herself at him and slumped into my Dad's arms, wrapping herself limply around him. "I'm a tiny bit pished." She was stating the glaringly obvious. Dad held her and over her head he kissed me. I relaxed as the tension was replaced by genuine amusement. His eyes twinkled.

"Interesting evening?" He could see the images in my head.

I nodded "Very."

"Your mouth's blue."

I laughed. "I know." I swayed a little.

He narrowed his eyes.

"Exactly how much did you drink?"

"Four bottles." This was three, possibly four too many for Dad to be happy with.

"I won't ask how many Jess had."

"Think she drank a crate full." Dan chuckled. He stuck his head into all the rooms off the hallway. "I've always wondered what the inside of this house was like. It's nice isn't it?"

Dad righted Jess and she wandered down the hall, bouncing gently off the wall as she went.

Somewhat unexpectedly, seeing as I had already greeted him, Dad pulled me into a hug. It was a little too firm not to set alarm bells ringing in my head.

"Dad?" I whispered. I sought reassurance. "Is everything OK?"

He sighed. "We had a difficult journey up. We got delayed."

"Dan said the roads here could be crammed."

"It wasn't the roads." My hand went to touch his face; I wanted to see his memories and know why he was concerned. I had discovered the little quirk by accident back in the summer. With Dad, my talent worked in reverse. But his hand met mine and stopped me and the worry levels within shot up.

"Where's Mom? Is she OK?"

"Yes, she's fine, she's with Jane."

"Jake?"

"He's in the kitchen getting food. Don't worry, he's fine too."

My two immediate concerns had been addressed, but something was concerning him. Dan had followed Jess through into the room on the right; we were alone in the hallway.

"Dad, what's wrong?"

He fixed me with a sad expression. I tried again to touch his face, but again his hand stopped me.

"You already know how this feels."

"I do?"

He nodded and pulled me back to him again. I wrapped my arms around him and rested my cheek on his shoulder.

"Oh Nessie," he sighed. "I'm sorry, but I don't think we're going to get the relaxing Christmas we were after."

I pulled back.

"What happened?"

"Jane got a 'singer'."

"Oh no!" He was right, I did know exactly how that felt. The memory of me experiencing what his reaction had been to his 'singer', my Mom, flooded back into my head and I winced. Even at this distance the overwhelming bloodlust was still verging on the unbearable.

"She…?"

"Didn't manage to resist."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: Singer**

Dan sat hunched on the sofa. His arms rested on his knees and his hands were clasped in front of him. Mom sat next to him, her hand on his back. Jake was next to me and Dad stood by the fire. Will was carrying Jess down the stairs.

"And you say weeks?" Dan looked to Dad.

"I can't put an exact figure on it, but you'll need to give her time. It's going to take a while before she'll trust herself to be around you again."

"She's very angry with herself." Said Mom. "She'd managed a whole year without human blood and she's feeling very down about losing that right now."

"All the more reason why I need to be with her."

"I'm sorry but you can't," replied Dad. "She won't put you in that danger."

"I don't really care about that right now!" Dan snapped.

"You may not, but Jane does."

"So I can't see her at all? Not even from a distance?"

"Let's give her a little time; this only happened a few hours ago. In a while we can get you together, outside and downwind of her."

"How romantic."

Will came into the room with Jess in his arms. They'd been spending time with Ben. He placed her on a sofa, disappeared and returned with a large glass of water.

"Was that what the thing was on the news tonight? I saw there'd been an incident at a safari park down south." Jess drawled.

"Yes." Dad replied. "Woburn Abbey has a large herd of deer. I thought we'd stop there, so we didn't need to venture too far over the holiday. Jane didn't want deer and went in search of something from the safari park. Unfortunately, one of the lions was receiving treatment from a vet."

"She had both of them, the vet and his assistant." Said Dan. It didn't need to be said, every vampire here knew that. You couldn't stop at one if there would be witnesses.

"So you've got to keep away for a few days until she regains her composure?" Asked Jess.

"Not days, weeks. Edward said a 'singer' sort of scrambles your system a bit, makes it difficult for you to think straight."

"But Bella was a 'singer' for you?" Jess said to my Dad.

"I'd had over sixty years away from human blood. Jane has only had one, against over twelve hundred years of being a traditional vampire. It will be hard for her to start over."

"So where is she now?" I asked.

"About a mile away, up by Easedale Tarn." Dad replied.

"In this weather?" Dan sounded appalled. "Get her to come inside!"

"She'll come back when you're not here. Your scent will upset her for a while. Trust me; it's hard when the scent of the one you love, is also the scent of the one you want to kill." Dad looked at Mom, remembrances of times past in his eyes.

However hard it was for Dan, he did know that the consequences of Jane being unable to control herself could be tragic. Either he would end up becoming a vampire and his parents would be upset; or Jane would be unable to stop herself killing him and she would be upset. Whichever way you looked at it and as hard as it was for Dan to accept, staying apart was the only sensible option.

"Bella? You don't have anything to eat do you? I'm starving."

"Bloody hell Jess! A time like this and all you can think about is your stomach." Dan got up and stormed out of the living room.

"There's nothing you can do about it!" Jess shouted.

Will got up. "I'll go make you a sandwich."

"Thanks."

"And drink the water." He added as he went to the kitchen.

It was getting late and Susie and Brian would worry if we didn't arrive back soon. Before we left though, I managed to grab a few minutes with Jake.

"With us having to deal with things at Woburn, we'll have to head out again. Your Mom's eyes are too dark for your Dad to feel comfortable and Ben needs more."

"Mom is the least of our worries." My Mom had exceptional control over her thirst.

"True, but Edward will feel easier once Jane's back on animal blood. The day after Christmas is the most likely time for us to go."

"Christmas is not going to be easy."

"No. Kind of puts a dampener on everything."

"Their first Christmas as a couple, too."

"I know."

"But at least you're here. Whatever happens, it can't be as bad as last Christmas."

Jake pulled me to him and we kissed. There wasn't going to be a lot of time to be together so we had to make the most of the opportunities we had. Jess, Dan and I had come up with a schedule so each of us could spend nights with their partner. Dan was down for tonight, but obviously that wasn't going to happen now.

Shortly before midnight the three of us left Aysgarth House. Jess was in no condition to walk so Will carried her. Dan got a piggy-back from my Dad and Jake, in wolf form, ran beside me. We took a slightly more circuitous route home over the fields.

Having said our goodbyes, we dragged Jess the last few yards to the front door. We came out of the snow, the cold and darkness into a bright, warm and welcoming house. Susie came to meet us.

"Did you have a nice time?" Dan grunted, pushed past her and went straight upstairs. Susie smiled and then, as she noticed the state Jess was in, her smile quickly vanished.

"Oh _Jessica_," she sighed. "I hope you've not forgotten that I wanted your help at Morrisons first thing tomorrow? You did say that you and Ness would come."

Jess shook her head, swaying as she did so. "I'll be up."

"I bet you will. Being sick if your previous exploits are anything to go by."

"Nope, I'm fine." Jess assured her.

"We'll see." Muttered her Mum.

"Can I get you anything Ness? Toast? Tea? Coffee? Hot chocolate?"

"No thanks, I think I'll get to bed."

"I want to get going by half past six tomorrow, so if you girls are coming, you'd better be ready for then."

"Half past _six_!" Jess screeched.

"It's Christmas Eve, it'll be busy. I said I wanted to get there early. Are you going to come or what?"

"Yes."

"In that case you'd better get to bed and try and sleep some of this off."

"Yes _mother_."

I helped Jess upstairs. Dan's door was already firmly shut as we passed it and I steered Jess into our room. Either side of the window were two single beds. This was a room two boys shared and the décor was racing cars. The room Dan was in was done out in purple, it being the bedroom of a teenage girl. This house belonged to friends of Brian and Susie's, who were out of the country for Christmas. It was just around the corner from the house that the Taylor's had left over a year ago to come to Forks.

Jess sat down heavily on the bed, leant forward to take off her boots and swayed alarmingly. I flitted over to steady her and pulled off her boots.

"Thank you Nessie." She said; the tiredness was taking over now. Jess pulled off her outer clothing and still wearing her underwear fought her way into her pyjamas, climbed into bed and threw the quilt over herself. "Night." She called weakly.

"Night Jess." I returned.

I put on my own pyjamas and slid into bed. I lay there for a while thinking about Dan and Jane and how sad this Christmas was going to be for them. Before he'd wrapped it, Dan had showed me the beautiful gold necklace that he'd bought for Jane. Now he wasn't going to be the one to give it to her. That was so sad.

The pair of them had been almost inseparable since their wedding. There was no opportunity for a honeymoon but Jane had taken to hanging around at school, grabbing every second she could with her husband. There had been more than one occasion where he'd turned up after lunch in a dishevelled state. These appearances caused much amusement for us, especially when there was an announcement that damage to things in the janitor's cupboard would not be tolerated. Jess had actually wept with laughter after that notice was read out.

From experiencing my Dad's reaction to my Mom when they first met, I had some idea of what Jane was going through. With Dan, I just imagined being made to stay away from Jake. I didn't have much trouble imagining how wretched that would be.

Jess was out like a light and within very few minutes small snores were coming from her. But that didn't mask something else coming through the wall. It was the heartbreaking sound of not very well stifled sobs from Dan. I grabbed my phone and sent him a text message.

**I'm still awake if you want to talk.**

I heard his phone beep a few seconds later. A minute later mine beeped in return.

**Thanks, but I'm OK. Night Ness. x**

"Oh Dan, you're so very not OK." I whispered to myself. I texted a goodnight to him, turned over and tried to settle down to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: Cabbages and Carols**

"Welcome to hell." Said Jess as the doors slid open. "Otherwise known as Morrisons Kendal." She pushed the trolley into a store that was even more crowded than the pub had been last night.

"Oh my." I murmured. I'd never seen anything like it. Never having had to prepare for a human Christmas meant I had not appreciated how much of it was about food.

"I know. I don't know whether you're supposed to pitch up here with shopping bags or boxing gloves. It's hideous every Christmas Eve."

"Right then girls, veggies first!" Susie set off in the direction of the fresh produce. Jess and I tried to weave the trolley through the crowd.

"How do you feel?" I asked her.

"Like shit."

"Tell me if you feel sick again."

"I will. Thanks for staying up with me."

"You'd do the same for me, I know."

"You wouldn't be so daft as to drink stupid amounts of vodka."

"Not again. Been there, done that, ended up on YouTube. Just don't take off your sunglasses, you have scary red eyes." I grinned at her.

"I wish." She sighed.

The sound of Jess scrabbling out of bed had woken me. I stayed with her as time and again she threw up. I'd helped her to wash and dress and had presented her, to the somewhat surprised Susie, on the dot of six thirty. The only outward sign of Jess's fragile state were the unseasonal sunglasses.

Dan was sleeping when we left and I was pleased about that. I hadn't managed to get to sleep easily last night and I knew that Dan was still tossing and turning when I finally drifted off. Brian was going down to Susie's Mum's to start to work on the big list of small jobs that she'd made for him. Apparently, there was no one else in the universe who could fix a dripping tap.

Navigating around the crowded supermarket was not easy or fun. In contrast to the happy music playing over the PA system, there seemed to be a distinct lack of Christmas cheer amongst the people pushing trolleys laden with food. I didn't know if it was Christmas that was coming, or the end of the world.

"How many days are the stores closed?" I asked Jess, after passing one woman whose trolley seemed to be half full of loaves of bread.

"Just Christmas Day."

"_Really_? People seem to be buying like they're never opening again."

"Oh this is quite normal. We may give you the impression that we're an advanced industrialised nation, but scratch the surface of Britain and there's an awful lot of muppetry going on, I mean look at that." She pointed across the aisle. "That couple have got _three_ trolleys. Have they got the whole of Kendal coming for Christmas lunch?"

"One's full of alcohol." I noted.

Jess peered at the contents. "Good grief, I didn't know anyone actually drank _Crème__ de__ menthe_. Why would you willingly drink something that's bright green?"

I laughed and reminded her that she'd spend all last night drinking blue WKD.

"Yes, but that's nice. _Crème__ de__ menthe_ is just vile."

"I wouldn't know."

"Trust me, it is."

Thankfully, Susie was blessed with common sense and understood that it was easier to park up somewhere and for her to bring the things to us.

It was here, with Jess resting her head against a bank of toilet rolls, that there was a light tap on the back of my leg.

I turned around to see Ben looking up at me with his finger pressed to his lips. A huge grin split my face. I glanced down the aisle and saw Will standing at the end. There was a chance Susie would recognise him from the summer, so he'd need to keep his distance. Ben, however, continued to be the impossible child and was unrecognisable from the eighteen month old she'd seen back then.

"Daddy wants to know how Mummy is this morning." He spoke quickly and at sub-human hearing level.

"Not great." I replied. "But I'm sure she'd feel better if I sent her to get something." Ben smiled and scurried back down the aisle. I stepped over to Jess, thinking of something right at the bottom of Susie's list that she hadn't gotten to yet. "Your Mum needs some sugar, I don't know where that is."

"I'll go and get it. I'll pick up something from the bakery while I'm there too, I'm ravenous."

Jess set off down the aisle, she turned out of sight just as Susie came back with another armful of things.

"Where's Jess?"

"She's gone to pick up some sugar and get something from the bakery."

"Oh, ok. You alright to look after the trolley?"

I nodded.

"I'm off to get some more, back in a sec!"

I waited, watching all manner of grumpy, overheated people pass by. Presently, Jess came back, clutching a paper bag and looking _very_ much happier than she had done a few minutes ago.

"It's amazing what you can get in the bakery section."

"Did you find something nice?" I grinned at her.

"I'll say." Through her dark glasses I saw her wink.

"You forgot the sugar."

"Oh _no_!" She said theatrically. "I'll _have_ to go back _again_."

"You will." I waggled my eyebrows at her.

"Pack it in Cullen." She whispered.

"Do you want me to get it?"

"No, I can manage." She said wryly, turned and walked back down the aisle a great deal quicker than she'd come up. At the end, she put out her hand to grab a pole and swing around the corner. But she missed and pulled a pile of boxes off the shelf. I thought it was very generous of the man and his little boy to help her pick them all up again. When she came back for the second time blushing furiously, I hadn't the heart to tell her that she'd still forgotten the sugar.

At the checkout, the lack of sugar was discovered, so Jess went back a third time and came back with sugar and disappointment. There was no sign of Will and Ben. She scanned the crowds, looking for his distinctive blonde hair. Her Mum noticed.

"Who are you looking for?"

Jess's reply was surprisingly candid. "The guy I saw in the bakery. Honestly Mum, he was divine."

"Divine men in Kendal? Wonders will never cease. Well if you see him again invite him for lunch tomorrow. I think I've bought enough."

"Mum you've bought enough to feed the whole of Grasmere. It's just us lot and Grandma, you know? You've not got it mixed up with feeding the five thousand have you?"

"No, but I want to make sure that I've got enough. I don't want to get to half past one tomorrow afternoon and find that I don't have enough sprouts. Do you think we've got enough sprouts?"

"Mum, even one spout is one too many."

"Well Dan and your Dad like them."

"They're just weird."

Susie paid and we joined the slow queue of people leaving the store. Everyone was struggling to guide their loaded trolleys around corners. Then suddenly Ben was there, turning around to grin cheekily back at the three of us. He had a huge lollipop in his mouth, which made one cheek stick out like he had a hamster pouch. A cabbage rolled out of a bag and onto the floor. Ben retrieved it and handed it back to Susie. She thanked him profusely and looked around for his parents, to tell them what a polite little boy they had; but they didn't seem to be around. When she looked back, the boy had melted back into the crowd.

Overnight, a warm front had passed through, turning all last night's snow to slush. The roads were clear, but there still remained enough on the fells to give the area a distinctly wintery look. As we drove back and Jess dozed in the front passenger seat, I looked out of the window. Cumbria was beautiful and I could see why both Dan and Jess had found themselves at home on the Olympic peninsula. The two places shared a rugged beauty.

Back at the house, I found Dan standing by the French doors in the living room, staring out into the garden.

"Hey." I said softly. He turned to me and put his arm out, drawing me to his side. I put my arms around him. "How are you feeling today?"

"Sad."

"Have you spoken to her?"

He nodded, but didn't elaborate.

"How is she?"

"Upset. Which makes it worse, because all I want to do is this," Dan held me tighter. "And it's the one thing I can't do."

Susie walked into the living room.

"Oh! Sorry." She said and scuttled out again.

Dan snickered. "Well that's an unexpected lie put in place." He kissed the top of my head. "I do love you Ness." He dropped his voice lower. "But only in a sisterly way."

"Does that mean you're going to start taking the piss out of me and calling me all the names under the sun?"

"Absolutely, it's the mark of my true affection for you. The worse the name, the more I love you."

"What do you call Jane then?" I whispered.

"Oh it doesn't work for wives. She gets all the nice stuff." A sudden flash of pain showed on his face.

"You've got to be patient. Give her time, let her head clear."

"I know, that's what she keeps saying. Talking is better than nothing, but in some ways it's even greater agony because we're so close. If she was at home and thousands of miles away, this would be easier. I'm hoping we can do the garden thing tomorrow. I want to give her my gift, even if it does have to go through a go-between. I hope she likes it."

"She'll love it, it's beautiful."

"What do you think Jake's got you?"

"I don't know. A tool-kit?" The pair of us giggled. "I'm more intrigued by what Mom and Dad have gotten me. Alice said it was an odd thing to give a seven year old."

"You already have two cars and that's pretty odd for a seven year old."

"I've had a car since I was five."

"See? That's odd. Jess told me what she and Will have got for Ben and I'm like, _'__what_, he's only five months old.' But she says he needs one. What did you get for your first Christmas?"

"An iPod, a locket and Jake gave me a Quileute promise bracelet that he'd made."

"An iPod at three months old. How weird is that?"

I chuckled. "Welcome to our family." I held him tighter.

"Ow." He grinned. It was nice to see him smile.

That evening was the first opportunity I had to meet Dan and Jess's Grandma, as we filed into church for the Christmas Eve Carol Service. I wasn't that familiar with churches, but this one made me think of Heather's church back in Forks. She'd only been there four months but was breathing life back into it. This church felt like it had lots of life in it too. It also had lots of people in it. I couldn't quite get over, that wherever we went was packed and there were queues everywhere. When I commented on it, Jess looked at me like I was slightly stupid.

"It's Christmas." Was her only explanation.

We walked towards the front, to where Mary Burton had saved a pew for us. Susie sat next to her Mum, followed by Brian, Dan, me and Jess. Susie, Mary and Jess looked very similar; there was no doubting the family resemblance. Mary Burton was wearing smart fashionable clothes and her grey hair was cut into a modern style. All in all it made guessing her age quite difficult but she had to be around twenty years older than her daughter.

As Dan expected, Susie had completely accepted the idea that we were a couple and had rearranged the dining table earlier so that I now sat next to Dan. Jess had furrowed her brow at that, until I explained what had transpired during the afternoon.

Jess snorted. "Good luck with keeping up that charade."

"There are worst charades to have to keep up." I said and Jess's amused expression vanished in a trice.

"You're not wrong."

So here I was, sat in a church. I didn't do this all that often. What I was and what this place was didn't automatically go together. I looked behind me; people were still streaming in through the doors. I saw other people from the pub last night, including Gem, who looked more like a bat than ever today. Even Tom was here and he waved and smiled to me as he sat down a few rows back. Gem wafted her way down to the front and kissed the Vicar on the cheek. I looked to Jess, wanting explanation about _that!_

"Oh sorry, I should have told you. That's Gem's Dad. Strange but true. The mad vampire obsessive's Dad is the Vicar. You couldn't make it up."

I flicked through the carol sheet I'd been handed. I didn't know many of these and I'd certainly never sung the ones I did.

The service was surprisingly enjoyable and the congregation relished a chance to have a good sing. Mary was one of the readers and so too was Gem. Her piece was delivered in grave dramatic fashion and it seemed strangely inappropriate that the congregation didn't applaud wildly when she'd finished. Not that everything was serious. Jess decided to sing alternate rude versions of some carols, making me and Dan laugh. That didn't go down well with Susie, who hissed at her daughter that she was in a church and should have some respect.

"I love how she thinks that God's not got a sense of humour." She whispered. "I mean you only have to look at Dan to know that he was most definitely having a laugh there."

"Shhh!" Susie glared at her daughter.

Jess put her hand up to acknowledge that she'd stop it. But it didn't stop her rolling her eyes at her fun being curtailed.

At the end, Susie and Brian launched into doing more catch ups with people and Tom came over to me.

"So how are you liking Britain?"

"Good thanks. It's busy." I noted.

"You should see it in summer. It's worse." I couldn't imagine that the supermarket could be any worse. "I don't usually come to church." Tom sounded like he was apologising for being here.

"Me either."

"I'm not sure about the whole God thing, but this is always a good service to come to. Are you coming over to the pub?"

"I don't know what we're doing."

"Dan!" Tom called. Dan turned round "Pub?"

"Pub!" Dan called back, "Hang on!" He pushed his way through the throngs of people. "Can you believe this? My Grandma's got a boyfriend, at her age!"

"George? Keep up mate; we all know about that."

"He's barely sixty, it's just _wrong_!" Dan exclaimed.

"Oh, give them a break." Said Tom. "I think it's nice that you can find love at any age. Whether you're twenty two or seventy two."

'Or twelve hundred and two' I added in my head. Older women and younger guys really shouldn't be much of a shock to Dan.

"No wonder she's spruced herself up a bit." Commented Dan. "She's looking good these days. Hopefully a bit of excitement in her life will put paid to those endless comments that she'll be dying soon. She's not old, she'd just got it into her head that she was."

While Tom's Mum came over to claim his attention. Dan leaned over to me.

"He likes you. He keeps asking me things about you." Dan grinned.

"It's going to be a disappointment to him that you got there first."

He grinned. Susie came over.

"Pub you two?"

"Ask a silly question." Said Dan.

We walked out of church and Tom fell into step beside me. He asked questions constantly and made me smile. As we were about to leave the grounds, Dan poked me in the back. I turned to him and he surreptitiously pointed out that Jake was standing under a tree a little way away.

"I think someone's a bit jealous." Dan whispered.

I gave Jake a smile, but it was not returned as it would normally be. His expression was a little too forced. My heart ached to be with him. This was the difficulty of the life we led and he knew that.

Where last night had been all about getting drunk tonight was more sociable. Jess was yawning constantly thought and getting a little fidgety, tonight was her night to spend with Will.

"I'm so tired. I know as soon as my head hits the pillow I'll be out like a light. I'm not going to be good company, but I will sleep better knowing he's there. It's funny how you get used to it very quickly."

"I wouldn't know." I smiled. Mine and Jake's occasional nights together were just that, occasional. It was only because we'd have precious little time together over the holiday, that my parents were even agreeing to let me share a bed with him. And that was all it could be. If either one of us decided that a bed was for anything other than sleeping in, we'd be sleeping at opposite ends of the earth.

Jess kept looking at her watch and yawning loudly. Finally the hint was taken and we started back for the house. Jess walked as fast as she possibly could. She kissed her parents good night and ran up to our room. She grabbed a pile of stuff, disappeared into the bathroom and returned looking too well groomed to be going to bed.

I got into bed and read for a while. Jess sat in her bed and stared at the clock as it ticked its way on to midnight. I glanced over a few minutes later and saw that she'd fallen asleep sitting up. I laid her down so she wouldn't get a sore neck. She was so tired and I knew that Will would let her sleep.

The tapping at the window alerted me to his arrival. I pushed it open and he climbed in.

"Sorry, she's out for the count." I said.

"That isn't a surprise." Will sat on the bed and stroked her hair. Jess didn't respond. "I'll let her sleep."

"She'll be disappointed; she wants to be with you."

"I know. Do you mind if I stay?"

"Not at all, how are things at the house?"

"Easier, Jane was a little happier after she spoke to Dan today and she's looking forward to seeing him tomorrow. Edward isn't too happy with her head though, she's fixating on his blood too much; so it's likely that we'll head straight out after you guys have gone tomorrow. He's picked a remote area of southern Scotland to head for, one that isn't too much of a drive from here."

"Are you all going?"

Will knew what I was getting at. "Yeah sorry. We need Jake. Just in case, you know?"

I nodded sadly. The ability to tear vampires apart was a skill few possessed and Jake had that.

"You and Jake should have swapped with us for tonight."

"She really wanted to see you, but tiredness won out."

Tiredness was winning out in me too.

I said goodnight to Will. He lay down beside Jess on top of her covers. I settled down and fell asleep dreaming of absolutely nothing.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: Christmas - Parts 1 and 2**

Finding Will on her bed when she woke on Christmas morning, was some consolation for Jess.

"Best Christmas present ever." I heard her mumble through kisses. "Can I unwrap you now? Oh. Ness."

I laughed. "You'll have to wait 'til later to play with your toys." I added, announcing that I was awake. I rolled over and Jess beamed at me.

"See? There is a Father Christmas, or a Santa Claus, whatever you guys call him."

"I just call him Dad." I grinned.

"Don't you do Father Christmas?"

I shook my head. "There's enough make believe in my life without adding human folklore into the mix."

"Aw, that's sad. Anyway, Happy Christmas Ness."

"Happy Christmas Jess."

"Happy Christmas Will."

"Happy Christmas darling."

Under the covers, Jess kicked her feet with glee. "That should sound really hokey, but from you it just sounds divine." Jess sighed with contentment. It was time to give them some privacy.

"I'll go get a shower." I got out of bed and grabbed my wash bag. "No breaking the furniture, there isn't any superglue in the house."

Jess and Will chuckled as I left the room.

While Jess and I were almost running down the road to Aysgarth House; Dan, for understandable reasons, was not. It was a gorgeous morning. Blue skies and a heavy frost overnight meant that what snow was left was crunchy underfoot. We stopped at the end of the drive and waited for him. He looked so glum.

It was barely nine o'clock, but Jess had insisted to her Mum, that if we were going to spend the afternoon in a turkey-induced coma, that she wanted to get out for a walk this morning. Susie had told us that lunch would be on the table at half past one, so we had four and a half hours to do Christmas: Part one.

When I opened the front door Ben was already waiting. He launched himself at Jess and wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"Steady on Ben!" she coughed.

"Sorry."

Dan mussed the little boy's hair, kissed his head and wished him a Happy Christmas. From the downstairs rooms came Jake, Will, Mom and Dad. I felt acutely sad for Dan; this wasn't going to be an easy day.

"I thought we'd do this outside, so we can all be together." Trust Mom to come up with something we could all do.

I kissed my parents and then gravitated over to Jake, almost sighing when his arm went around me. He felt like coming home and there was nowhere I'd rather be than with him. He really had no need to be envious of Tom.

We went out onto the terrace at the back of the house. There was hardly a breath of wind, which was in our favour for now. Jane was sat on a log by the edge of the woods. Dan automatically walked forward, wanting to go to her; but that made her get up and back off.

"Don't push her." Dad said gently. "Let her decide what to do."

Dan stepped back and Jane returned to the log. Mom walked across to be with her.

"Am I OK to go over?" I asked Dad.

"Maybe later."

"She's too sensitive to even be around Ness?" Queried Jake.

"She's very unsure of herself right now, I don't want to give her more than she feels she can handle."

However we did this, Jane was always going to be the other side of the garden. But, we did what we could and sitting in a horseshoe with Jane at the open end, we went with the happiest thing first - seeing Ben open his present. He sat on Jess's lap and Will handed him a flat, rectangular parcel.

"Don't drop it, it's heavy." Said Jess.

"It's not heavy for me." Ben replied in a slightly cheeky tone.

Jess rolled her eyes. "Ok, stop showing off, just open it."

Ben carefully pulled off the paper to reveal a shiny silver laptop.

"My five month old nephew's got a better computer than me."

"Yes, well he's smarter than you and needs a faster processor than your pedestrian brain can possibly cope with." Jess grinned at her brother.

"Ok, who's next?" Said Dan.

Dad picked up a long, thin parcel and handed it to me. "This one's for both Ness and Jake, from both of us."

It was light but solid. I looked at Jake for a clue, but he didn't have one either. I picked open the end and pulled the gift out of the wrapping paper. It was a bar of wood.

Jake and I laughed.

"Er… Thanks Mom, Dad. It's a… really great piece of wood."

"Yeah, thanks guys." Jake laughed.

"There's more where that came from." Dad said.

"You mean you got us a wood pile?" Jake turned the bar of wood over in his hands.

"Not quite, although it will be a pile when you choose which one you want." Jake was as equally perplexed as me. "That's part of a house."

"You bought us a _house_?" I was incredulous.

"You've got to decide which one you want and where you want to build it, but yes; we bought you a house."

I looked at Jake then to Dad and over to Mom. "Thank you." I said.

"That's incredibly generous of your both." Said Jake.

"Your Dad's getting married, we figured you'd need a place of your own soon."

Jake chuckled. "Yeah, I could do with that now. Those walls are _way_too thin."

I was touched by the generous gift but also sad. I couldn't share this house with Jake because we weren't even close friends in the human world, let alone an established couple. I looked at Dad; he knew how I was feeling. I wanted to be with Jake more than anything and I didn't care what humans might think about us. I was eighteen in their world and that was old enough to be dating a twenty three year old.

"We'll talk about it later." Dad said quietly.

It wasn't until Dad walked over to Jane with Dan's gift that we saw the extent of what the 'singer' had done to her. As he approached I saw her stiffen and Dad stopped in the middle of the lawn. Mom stroked her back but Jane's face contorted in agony. Even her proximity to Dan's scent on the gift was causing her distress.

"Oh crap." I heard Jess say softly.

Dan was standing at the edge of the terrace and seeing Jane's reaction, his head slumped forward onto his chest. His hand came up and I knew that he was crying.

I wasn't watching Jane directly, but from the corner of my eye I saw her move. There was a sudden commotion and when I looked, Dad was holding Jane as tight as he could.

"Dan, go!" He called. Dan bolted back into the house, followed by Jess and Ben. Will and Jake ran forward to assist Dad with Jane. I stood motionless. Jane's face told me that her desire for Dan's blood was winning. I couldn't bear it and retreated inside.

Jess and Dan were in the living room. Dan was sat on the floor in front of the sofa. His knees were pulled up and he was resting his forehead on them. Jess was on the sofa next to him. I stepped around him and sat the other side.

"How is she?" Jess asked.

I shook my head. "Not good."

"I suppose we forget just what an incredible effort it is to keep away from human blood. The rest of you make it look so easy."

"They've been doing it for a long time, but you know that Jasper has never found it easy."

"I know."

"He went for my Mom once, did you know that? On her eighteenth birthday."

"No? Bet your Dad wasn't happy about that."

"We haven't talked about it but Jasper told me. It still upsets him at times."

"If I was a vampire, this wouldn't be an issue." Said Dan, his voice muffled.

"Do you want to transition now?" Asked Jess. "There's no plan in place. We agreed to wait until after graduation."

"I know that!" Dan snapped. I just want to be with her. She can't be with me as I am now, so it's the only logical choice."

"Transitioning here and now would present problems." I added.

"Like what?" Dan looked at me; his eyes were wet and red from crying.

"It's not isolated enough for one thing."

"What do you mean?"

"You know it's not a quiet process. People would hear you." There was no other way to tactfully put it. I knew how venom felt, I knew the pain involved and I knew that screaming was very likely to happen. "Plus, you want Jane to do it. I don't think she can do it without killing you right now."

"I'm not fussy, any vampire will do."

"You can't do this Dan, think of Mum and Dad."

Dan whipped round to face his sister.

"Don't tell me you wouldn't grab the opportunity if it were given to you? We both know that living these schizophrenic lives is bloody hard and bloody miserable at times. I mean, look at today and this poxy half and half we've had to split it into. Jane, Will and Ben are just as much our family as Mum, Dad and Gran; but we can't even mention them to our parents. I don't think I can do this much longer; I just want to be with Jane." Dan turned back around and put his head back down on his knees again. Jess rubbed his back.

"I do know how shit it is." She said quietly. "There isn't a day goes by when I don't feel like cracking and telling Mum about Ben. It breaks my heart that the only thing she'll have of him is fleeting glances like she got in Morrisons yesterday. But these are precious times Dan. When we change there'll be no way back."

"I know. And I forget that Jane is still new to all this. She was a traditional vampire for over a thousand years."

"She'll get it back." Said Jess. "Just give her time. She loves you and we all know it's a fine line between love and bloodlust." She grinned and ruffled her brother's hair. "Even Ness is stuck in the middle of something. She can't openly date Jake and now she's got a house she can't live in with him. We're all struggling Dan. Don't give up."

"Even the gift was too much for her."

"I'm sure she's got it by now."

A little later, Jake and I were in the kitchen. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me back against his chest. We stood in silence looking out at Jane. She was sat with Will now, while Jess spent some time with Ben.

Mom and Dad came in and the four of us talked about mine and Jake's relationship. Mom said that as soon as we were back, that we should 'go for it'. Those were her exact words. I think Dad's would've been more along the line of 'take it slowly', but he knew it was a three-to-one majority against him. We would certainly be 'going for it'.

Jake and I had mapped out our strategy months ago. It would start with casual encounters in the diner, moving on to organised meets for coffee and perhaps a meal there. I'd spend more time down at the Reservation and take an interest in cliff diving or car mechanics. He might come to some of our band's gigs or help out with our equipment. Either way, this time next year… Who knew! I would be out of school and that time could not come soon enough. At least now I had somewhere to live. If things continued to go well for Grampa and Heather, perhaps they'd need some privacy too.

With lunchtime approaching, we walked back up the road to the house in silence. It seemed wrong to discuss what had happened today, Dan didn't need any more salt rubbed into his wounds. We were greeted by Susie who called that she was serving up. We shrugged out of coats, scarves and hats and went though to the dining room, for Christmas: Part two.

Mary endeared herself to me, by having paid attention to what had been said about me. She knew exactly how I'd come to be in Forks, which meant not having to repeat the pack of lies. I sat next to Dan. I was unsure of our 'blossoming romance', but Dan was more confident, shocking me when he put his hand on my leg. There was a whole lot of awkward going on, but Dan was determined that his parents believed we were a couple; so I pressed my acting skills into service and hung on my new boyfriend's every word.

It wasn't long before Jess's eyes rolled at her Grandma's first mention of church and faith.

"Grandma, you know not everyone believes in that stuff."

"I'm not the one who believes in vampires and I think the concept of eternal life is one that crops up there, so you can hardly say anything." I began to see where Jess's razor-sharp wit came from.

"Jess is right Mum, not everyone believes like you do." Susie didn't want me to be made uncomfortable by her Mum talking about spiritual things. I found it funny more than anything.

"I was only asking Ness if she's got a faith. I suppose it's ok to ask if she's got a car?"

"I do have a car." I replied. "But no, I don't have a faith. Although Charlie's girlfriend is the Pastor of a local church and she's encouraging me to explore it."

"Good! I'm glad to hear it. Perhaps she might have better luck with Jess than our Vicar Roger did here."

"No, I've irrevocably given my soul to the Church of the Sexy Vampire." Jess said flippantly. Dan and I smiled at her.

"Jess." Susie glowered. "There's no need for that."

"Oh, she'll grow out of it." Said Mary, smiling indulgently at her grand-daughter.

"I wish she would. For a while it seemed to die down, but now it's back and as full on as it ever was. I blame Gem for this. Away from her, all that nonsense seemed to go away. Ness is a much better influence on Jess."

Jess's eyebrows raised at that and I fought back a smile. Even Dan bit his lip.

"So you're not into vampires then, Ness?" Mary asked.

"I don't mind them." It was my stock response. And what more could I say? I loved them and they irritated the heck out of me in the same way that all families did. "But no, I'm not obsessed by them. I leave that to Jess."

"For which I'm sure Charlie is eternally grateful," added Brian. "I can't begin to think why a dead bloke who looks like he's suffering from rigor mortis can be classed as attractive."

"Oh and you're an expert on vampires now, are you Brian?" Mary laughed.

"We watched a vampire film the other night. If that's what young girls are after, then there's scant hope for the rest of mankind."

"Oh it was a good film, really scary." Said Susie.

Dan leaned over to me. "This is a bizarre conversation." He whispered.

Susie completely misread what was going on.

"Aww… Whispering sweet nothings. I remember when your Dad used to do that."

Jess tried to cover up a laugh with a cough.

"Something funny?" Asked Susie. She put down her knife and fork. "You know, at times I could swear there's something going on between the three of you. You're always having secretive conversations, giving each other looks or going off somewhere. What are you doing, running a drugs cartel?"

"Yes Mum, we're running a multi-million dollar drugs operation from Chief Swan's kitchen." Dan looked at his Mum. "We're teenagers Mum; it stands to reason that we're not going to tell you everything that happens in our lives."

"Yes, well that's when things happen." Susie was clearly referring to what happened to Jess over the summer. Or rather, what she thought had happened to Jess. That killed the conversation stone dead for a minute or two. The subject was clearly uncomfortable for Susie to think about. Jess looked down at her plate and stabbed at a piece of broccoli.

Mary broke the silence. "I've got some things I'd like to pass on to you, Jess. I wondered if you wanted to come round tomorrow night and I can give them to you. It's some jewellery and other bits and pieces that I have, nothing much. And it would be a chance to find out what you've been up to this last year."

"Actually, we were planning to go into Bowness for the evening."

"Oh there'll be other nights you can do that, we're not going back until the third. It would be nice if you could spend some time with your Grandma." Susie's tone of voice indicated that Jess was expected to go.

"Yes, we can go again." Said Dan. "Besides, you'd just be a gooseberry if you came." He grinned and Jess stuck out her tongue.

"We could watch a film." Said Mary. "I like a good scary movie."

"Do you?" Susie sounded incredulous. "I thought you were more _Sound__of__Music_ than _Silence__of__the__Lambs_."

"Oh no. I've developed a bit of a taste for the scary stuff, George likes it. How about it Jess? You, me, a bottle of wine and a film."

"What's not to like?" Added Dan.

Jess turned to her Grandma. "OK." She said, liking the sound of that. "You're on!"

"Good! Do you still like those cheesy straw things? I've got some of those in too. Are you a red wine or a white wine girl?"

"I'll drink anything."

"That's a slight understatement." Muttered Dan.

"Well I prefer red, but let me know if I need to put a white in to chill."

"Are you running a wine cellar now, Mary?" Brian chuckled.

"I'm getting there. George has got me onto the good stuff. You can get some good wines for seven to ten pounds a bottle."

"Bloody hell Mum! Ten pounds for a bottle of wine! They saw you coming didn't they?"

Even I had to laugh at that. The candid way the family spoke and the almost comedy timing they had, was one of the reasons I loved the Taylor family so much. Their house had been a haven last year when Grampa's house had descended into a war zone. I was very grateful for this chance to come and sample how British people lived, even if most of it seemed like an alien culture.

As Jess had predicted, by mid afternoon the family had descended into a 'turkey coma' - being too full and too sleepy to do much else other than sit on the sofa. However, there was the important matter of the Queen's speech to watch. Mary sat in rapt attention; Brian and Susie gave it a cursory glance while Dan and Jess were busy on their phones. Mine went off, it was a message from Jake.

**Heading out now. Back in 48hrs. Love you! J xx**

I texted back a similar reply and sighed. I looked over at Dan. By his pensive face I guessed he was chatting to Jane. Jess looked equally glum. It would be a long 48 hours marooned in the human world. It had only just started and the three of us were already feeling it. But we were off to the Vampire and Werewolf tomorrow. Even without Jess it was opportunity that I was not going to miss!


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six: The Vampire and Werewolf**

"Oh. My. God." Dan stated each word separately as he looked around at the interior of the Vampire and Werewolf. "It's a branch of Hollister, but with beer. Can I borrow your super _spidey_ sight? I can't actually see anything in here."

Tom, who was our driver for the night, saw we hadn't followed him and came back over.

"They're all at the back." He said, pointing.

"Can I get the beer?" I asked excitedly. I'd never bought beer before and here it was legal for me to do that.

Dan leaned in close. "Shall I take a photo of you doing it?"

"No." I smiled "You go catch up with your friends. What shall I get you both?"

Tom and Dan picked their way through the crowd to the back and I made my way over to the bar. The walls of the pub were black painted wood panelling. There was an enormous fireplace along one wall and arranged around it were huge leather armchairs. The lighting was very subdued and in places, none-existent. Along the walls were pictures of various stylized vampires and werewolves. I scanned the name plates, looking for people that I knew, but found none. What little colour there was in here was on the purple shirts of the bar staff. It was dark, oppressive, sexy and all an exercise in cliché. The music was loud and excellent though. Whoever had chosen it had great taste.

The bar area was two deep with people so I waited my turn, engaging in my favourite activity of people-watching. It was necessary if you wanted to successfully blend in. Being possessed with vampire attraction that I couldn't turn off did get me served quicker, but it also got me some unwelcome attention.

"What's a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?" I refused to look at the man and narrowed my eyes in irritation. "Can I buy you a drink?"

"No thank you."

"Aw come on honey." Honey? Nobody said that around here. Hang on, his accent was wrong, that was… I flicked a glance at him. "Hello." He smiled. It was Jake.

"What are _you_ doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in Scotland?"

Jake shrugged. "I wasn't needed after all."

"Really?"

"Really."

I wasn't complaining. "And that was a terrible attempt at a northern accent, don't let Jess hear it, she'll rip you to shreds."

"Whatever." He grinned and faced the bar, looking at the beers on offer. "So, what's good here?"

"I don't know. I'm getting _Frostbite_ for Dan. I'm not decided for myself yet."

"_Frostbite_?"

I pointed at the name on the beer pump a little way down the bar.

"Did they know you were coming?" He grinned.

"You think that's funny, look at the one two pumps down."

"_Body__snatcher_?"Jake laughed. "I'll have a pint of that."

I bought the beer and took Tom and Dan's drinks over to them. They were sat with Gem and some other girls from Grasmere. I moved away and beckoned to Dan that I wanted a private word. He came over.

"There's an American at the bar, I thought I'd keep him company."

Dan clocked Jake.

"So there is and he's doing a really good Shrek impression."

"He's not jealous." I asserted.

"Oh no? What's he doing here then?"

"He wasn't needed."

"Pull the other one Ness. That's a bloke who discovered you were spending the evening with Tom and got a tiny bit jealous."

"I'm not interested in Tom, Jake knows that."

"Doesn't mean he's not jealous though. Even if it's only because some other bloke gets to hang out with his girl."

"We've had almost no time together." It was a cheap shot and I realised that as soon as it was out of my mouth. Dan had had even less time with Jane. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok." It wasn't, I could tell by the wrinkle on his brow that the hurt had set up again.

"I'll tell Jake that I'm staying with you."

Dan shook his head. "No, go on. One of us at least deserves to have time with their other half. We'll see you later. Back here about eleven? There are some nice pubs in town, go check some of those out. This is corny in the extreme. What this place needs is a dose of Esmé."

I smiled. "I'll see you later; make my apologies to Tom for me." I went back to Jake.

Jake was amused by the pub and commented on everything, especially our presence there. We found a dark little corner to stand in. There were lots of dark corners and lots of couples standing in them. I began to see why this place was popular, it gave couples what they wanted, a little privacy. But this really wasn't a place we could easily talk, so we finished our drinks and left. As we walked out onto the street, Jake looked up at the pub sign hanging over our heads.

"Oh this is too good to miss." He handed his phone to the doorman and got him to take a picture of us both stood under it.

I looked at the picture, it was simple shot of two people under a pub sign, but it meant the world to me. Here, we could be a regular couple. Maybe moving to Britain would be one way to easily achieve that? There was no baggage here, no one to hide our relationship from and as we walked down the street I relished that freedom. Here, we were just us: Jacob Black and Renesmee Cullen. I suddenly got a longing for my own name. I had been Ness Masen for well over a year now and I was starting to lose Renesmee Cullen. Tonight, I'd be Renesmee again and leave Vanessa at home.

After a while I realised we were wandering aimlessly through the streets of Bowness on Windermere. I hadn't a clue where we were going and nor, it seemed, did Jake.

"Where are we headed?" I asked.

"I don't know. Is there any place you want to go?"

"I don't know what's here. Did you eat? Perhaps we should go get a curry, that's a very British thing to do."

"No I ate already. You?"

"Yep."

"Both types?" He smiled.

"I'm good." I didn't need blood yet, I was good for a couple more days.

It started to rain.

"The Old England has a nice bar," Jake said hesitantly. "We could go there?"

"You checked it out?"

"Yeah, when I checked in. I'm staying in town for the night." There was something he wasn't saying. His face was a dead giveaway.

"And?"

He rolled his eyes. "I forgot to come away with a house key. I'm locked out. OK, stop laughing!" I couldn't help it. "It's a nice quiet bar, perhaps we could go there? I think I'm getting old. Hanging out in noisy, crowded bars with kids isn't my scene."

"Oh, thanks." I jested.

"But if you want to do that, we can."

"No, take me to Old England!"

While we hurried through the rain to the hotel, something I'd tried to do last summer came back to me and suddenly every sense felt supercharged. I looked at my watch. It was just coming up to eight o'clock. We had three hours and I would take every second of that and hopefully finish what I'd started last summer.

As we reached the main entrance, Jake suddenly turned to me. His face looked anxious.

"Ness? I…"

I grabbed his wet face, pulled it down to mine and kissed him. "Let's go to your room." I whispered.

He sighed. "That's what I was thinking."

I looked into his eyes. "Right time, right location, nobody for _miles_."

He pulled me very close. "True. And there's another, very important thing."

"What?"

"It's Christmas."

I exhaled in almost shock and my head drew out what he'd said that time by Heart Lake, on the day my head had cleared and my love for him had first made itself very potently known. I tried and failed to stop a low growl escaping. My heart beat quickened in response to hearing Jake's pick up and my mouth was suddenly very dry.

I'm sure the decor of the hotel was very nice, but I wasn't paying attention. Armed with Jake's room key, I made my way up to the top floor while Jake collected a bottle of something from the bar. I was so fixated on what was to come that I struggled to get the door key in the right way, fumbling stupidly to get the green light to come on. Finally I managed it and hurled myself through the door and into the room.

"Wow Jake," I breathed, "You splashed out here." It wasn't a room, it was a suite.

It was not what I was expecting. The name Old England suggested to me that this would be Victorian décor, or going further back into history, something Tudor or with a medieval theme. But this was ultra-modern.

The area was split into three; there was a small living area with a sofa, coffee table, a TV and a writing desk. Next door was the bedroom and beyond that a bathroom, which wouldn't look out of place on a space station.

I wandered back into the living area. There was a knock on the door and I went to open it; it was Jake. I followed him back into the living room and he put the ice bucket down on the coffee table.

"Asking for champagne seemed a little obvious." He smiled and pulled the bottle out of the ice. "So I got sparkling water. I hope you don't mind? I'm more thirsty right now than in need of alcohol."

I closed the distance between us.

"Water's fine." I purred. I may need it later to put out the fire within me.

We kissed and I wasted no time in starting on the buttons on Jake's shirt. His hand came up to rest on mine, staying it. He broke off the kiss.

"Only if you're _absolutely_ sure that you want to do this." He whispered. "We won't be able to keep it a secret, you know that."

"I'd rather not talk about Dad right now."

"He could be angry."

"Jake, I considered myself married to you for all eternity from that first day. Having a piece of paper that says we're legally entitled to share a bed seems just a matter of window dressing. You love me, yes?"

"With every atom of my being."

"And I you. He knows that. Besides, if he starts on some biblical morals crap, I shall ask him who issued Adam and Eve with a marriage certificate."

Jake sniggered. "Nice one."

I glanced at the clock on the wall; it was nearly twenty past eight already.

"But we only have 'til eleven." I pushed his hand out of the way and started on his shirt buttons again. "Let's not waste another second."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven: Love and Other Things**

If there was a place called Bliss, then I was in it. Bliss was this bed, lying in Jake's arms having expressed in the most physical way, just how much we loved each other.

The smile on my face pretty much spoke for itself, although it was also because Jake kept drifting off to sleep. His periodic gentle snores made me smile and I had to override the urge to let him sleep.

I had insisted I could get myself to the pub, but he wanted to see me safely back there and so he needed to stay awake for that. Staying here was not an option, Susie and Brian needed to see me. But I wasn't staying in Grasmere. My plan was to get in, go upstairs, say hi to Jess, duck out the bedroom window and run straight back to Bowness. It wouldn't take me long. Jake and I could spent the whole night together and do this all over again.

I wanted to talk to Jake about how I felt about tonight but I was struggling to find the right words. Placing a hand on his cheek took care of that and he didn't go back to sleep after that.

Could people tell what we'd been doing? I was sure they couldn't, but it didn't stop me thinking that we'd gotten some neon sign pointing at us, announcing the fact that we'd been making love. Was I particularly glowing? Was Jake a little too red in the face? In the end my rational side told me to stop it and instead presented the suggestion that eleven o'clock was a little late to be heading out, when everyone else was making their way in.

The rain was torrential now and it streamed in rivers down the road. Overhead a helicopter swooped low over the buildings and we both watched it as it gained height over the town.

"Pretty sure that's illegal." Said Jake and wrapped his arms around me. We hurried, almost fused together as one entity, back through the streets to the Vampire and Werewolf.

The rain had driven everyone off the streets and the wind was getting up. It wasn't a nice night. We turned the final corner and even if my eyes could not believe what they were seeing, my nostrils picked up all the evidence I needed. Blood! I tensed. Jake sensed it and gripped me tighter. Ahead of us, parked outside the pub were two ambulances and three police vehicles. The entire street was bathed in pulsing blue light and even the rain looked blue. This was where everyone was, huddled under umbrellas and lined up four deep against the police cordon.

I didn't even have to voice my concerns, Jake knew and shared them.

"Stay here, I'll go and find Dan."

As Jake hurried over to the pub, I reversed up against a lamp post, wrapped my arms around it and laced my fingers together behind me, trying not to focus on that scent. I shut down my breathing, it was easier, but it didn't mean I could stop thinking about what was over there - fresh _blood_. I let the rain fall down my face and tried to recall the earlier part of the night, the blissful part; but it wouldn't surface when there were more potent desires.

About a minute later my phone beeped. I unlaced my fingers and reached into my pocket. It was Jake.

**It was a fight. Lots of injured. Tom has cut to his face. Dan not out yet.**

Ninety more seconds elapsed and I was rocking against the lamp post under the twin agonies of wanting to know if Dan was OK and wanting blood. I caved and made my way to the back of the crowd.

I managed to get closer to the Police tape. The sidewalk outside the pub was strewn with broken glass. Inside one of the ambulances, I could see a paramedic fixing a strap across someone lying on a gurney. The door was closed and the vehicle pulled away. I looked for Jake but couldn't see him. Police Officers in bright yellow jackets moved in and out of the pub, assisting those who were not injured. One of the Police Officers moved and I saw Jake. He was further down the street talking to Tom, who was sat on the ground being attended to by a paramedic. I moved back from the crowd and skirted the emergency vehicles in the street to get to them.

I approached cautiously. Tom was holding a pad of gauze over his face as the Paramedic taped it in place. But Jake wasn't talking to Tom now; he was talking to the Paramedic.

"It'll take you about an hour and a quarter to get there. It's on Newtown Road in Carlisle."

"Ok, thanks." Jake turned around to leave. "Ness! What are you doing here?" He was appalled that I'd come so close. I saw Tom's eyes stare with questions that I really didn't want to answer. Jake grabbed me and pulled me away. "We have to go to the hospital in Carlisle, that's where they've taken Dan."

"Was he in the ambulance that just left?"

"No, he was airlifted. He was in the helicopter that went over." He kept walking as fast as he could, pulling me away from the blood.

"That's bad?"

"Yes, massive blood loss. Paramedic didn't like his chances. Come on!" We broke into a run and headed for the car.

The journey out to the motorway on the twisty narrow roads was tortuous. It felt as if every slow driver was out on the road. Jake swore frequently, but finally he reached the M6 motorway and headed north, with his foot to the floor.

I fingered the cylindrical phial around my neck. All my family's phones were off they were out hunting. I'd literally yelled a message onto Jane's answering service; that she needed to get herself down to the Cumberland Infirmary in Carlisle. I left a slightly more rational message for Jess and an even more rational message for Dad, adding that I would use my phial if it was needed.

Although I was half vampire I could still be converted to a full one if I sustained a bite from another vampire; any other vampire, apart from my father. His venom acted as an antidote and so I permanently wore a phial of it around my neck. I'd learned my lesson about ever taking it off. However, if Dan was as critically ill as the paramedic said he was, then time was of the essence. I could save him if I could get close enough to bite him and break the phial of venom into the wound. I wasn't venomous, but I still had everything I needed to do the job. Vampire venom could restore and repair him back to perfection, but it could only do that with a heartbeat. It would be too late if he was dead. Of course, it would transform him into a vampire, but as that's what Dan wanted anyway, I didn't see a problem. Jane would get her husband back, Dan would be restored to full health, well, sort of; and… ok, yeah, we'd have the slight problem of a set of grieving parents and a patient going missing. Still, I was sure Dad could sort that out; he was good at that kind of stuff.

In Carlisle, Jake pulled into the parking lot. Through the windshield I saw the sign 'Pay and Display' and the charges underneath.

"I'm not paying that at this time of night!" I yelled, launched myself out of the car and strode off in the direction of the main entrance. Behind me I heard the car alarm beep as it was activated and the sound of Jake splashing through puddles to catch up.

"You've been here less than a week and you've already gone native; drinking beer and complaining about parking charges. If you even _mention_ the weather I'm gonna have to have you forcibly removed from the country." I knew he was trying to lighten the mood, but my head had one mission:

To get to Dan, before death got to him.

We strode through the main doors and found ourselves wet and bedraggled in a pristine, quiet, brightly lit lobby.

"Ok, where do we go?" Murmured Jake.

"Hello, can I help you?" I looked over to the left where a young woman sat behind a desk under a sign that said 'Reception'.

We walked over to her. "Yes. Our friend was just brought here by helicopter?" I was unsure of exactly what to say.

"What's his name?"

"Dan… iel Taylor."

The young woman typed Dan's name into the computer.

"Yes." She picked up the phone. "I'll get someone to come and see you. Please take a seat." She indicated to a row of chairs. After the frantic drive over here, to have everything grind to a halt because we had to wait for someone was frustrating beyond belief. But Jake and I sat down and he took my hands in his.

Time passed at a glacial pace. Other people came in and were directed to wards or to other departments, but still nobody came for us. I looked to Jake; there was a worry in his eyes that I did not want to see.

"Do you think we're too late?" I voice my deepest fear to him. He broke his grip on my hands and put an arm around my shoulder, pulling me close.

"Don't think about that. Has there been a response from anyone? My phone hadn't gone off but I pulled it out of my pocket to check it anyway.

"No."

Just then, a Doctor walked over to us.

"You're waiting for Daniel Taylor?"

I stood up, perhaps a fraction too quickly. "Yes! Is he ok?"

The Doctor didn't smile. "He's receiving treatment right now. If you follow me I'll take you somewhere you can wait."

More waiting, not something I wanted to do. Jake and I clutched each other as we followed the Doctor up to the fourth floor.

He showed us to a smartly furnished room and pointed out where we could get coffee and how to get down to the cafeteria if we wanted food. He left and Jake and I slumped down on one of sofas, somewhat relieved that although we had no news, Dan was in the best place he could be right now.

"I was thinking about earlier." Jake whispered. My mind had cleared; there was no difficulty in joining in with Jake's thoughts now. I smiled at him. "Just how bad would it be if we got on a plane, went to Las Vegas and got married?"

I thought about that for a moment.

"I don't think the worst thing would be Mom and Dad."

"No, I don't either. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Alice?" we said together and laughed.

"Yep!" Said Jake.

"We would _never_ hear the last of cheating her out of a wedding." I cuddled up to him. "But if we invited them all to Vegas…?"

"Vampires in Vegas. Now that's a movie title right there."

"Vanessa? Vanessa?"

I came to, bleary eyed. I was lying on the sofa and kneeling in front of me was a smartly-dressed middle-aged woman.

"Can you sit up for me?"

I was still dishevelled and damp. I looked around. Jake wasn't in the room.

"Where's Jake?"

"He's gone down to the Cafeteria to get some breakfast."

I looked at my watch; it was coming up to quarter to six. I got myself into a sitting position and the woman sat on the sofa beside me.

"My name's Monica and I'm a Police Officer. I'm really sorry to have to tell you that…"

Oh my God, no! I was too late. I'd been _sleeping_ while somewhere else in this hospital, Dan had died without me ever having a chance to get to him with the venom!

"… and I'm sorry, but Jess and her Grandma died in the fire."

…**To Be Continued.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight: Abyss**

I pulled my knees tighter to me, in some fruitless attempt to curl up so small as to disappear from existence. I was up against the wall, getting far as I could get from the terrifyingly empty bed across the room. Outside, the rain lashed against the windows and the wind howled. Even the very elements were raging against Jess's death. I would rage too if I could give voice to my pain. But for now, I could produce nothing. I was trapped in mute numbness.

Above the violent wind I could hear Susie in the room across the hall. She had found her voice and was leading the requiem for Jess and Mary. I joined in, in the silence of my heart.

The last twelve hours had been a magnitude worse than any pain from vampire venom. At least venom fire eventually burns itself out. This was pain without end. I hurt on every conceivable level, but the true gut-wrenching agony came when I thought of Will and Ben.

I only had one person to grieve, but Susie had two: Her mother and her daughter. Add to that her son, lying in the Intensive Care Unit of the Cumberland Infirmary. I'd seen him briefly before we'd left the hospital. He'd had vascular surgery and time would tell how or if his body would recover from such extensive blood loss. There was mention of disability and impaired brain function; but for now Dan was alive, officially listed as critical, but stable. He was being kept sedated to give his body the best chance to heal. He knew nothing of Jess.

I had been separated from Jake. Monica had taken me to where Brian and Susie were and I couldn't ask to remain with a man I wasn't supposed to know. I'd made a slip in asking for Jake, but that was the least of my worries. For now I was marooned in the human world. With no Dan and no Jess around I had no reason to leave the house and no one to cover for me if I did.

It was only half past six in the evening, but with the darkness outside and my tiredness within, it felt like the middle of the night. The emotional onslaught had worn everyone out and so I had not lingered when Susie had made her excuses and gone to bed. I chose to follow, to find what space I could to be alone with my grief.

Brian had stayed downstairs with Lesley and David Barrington. Lesley was doing what friends did best: Making cups of tea, protecting the Taylors from over-zealous neighbours and reminding us all to breathe. I was not the only one who was struggling to remember to do that tonight.

I focussed on the sound of the wind, tearing around the house and hurling each raindrop at the glass as if it was trying to force them through. It had been like this all day. Every so often the house itself seemed to buckle a little under the onslaught; whilst above, the sky was crying tears on my behalf. I drew comfort from that. The sky was welcome to cry until I could.

Above my head the roofing tiles were being caught by the wind, there would be some off for sure by the morning. I pulled the quilt tighter around me, trying to block out the grating sound of them. I could no more do that than I could block out my feelings.

And then suddenly there were arms and hair and the scent of motherly reassurance. She was wet, but I did not care. The magnitude of pain gradually lessened enough to allow teardrops to form and raggedly little sobs start to emerge from my chest.

The wind was quieter outside now that Hurricane Bella had found a way in.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine: Daylight**

Susie grasped me to her and I put my arms gently around her in return. Now was not the time to be concerned about how I might feel to this unknowing human.

"Call Charlie, call your cousin; tell them what's happened."

I didn't need to, they already knew; but I must be seen to make the calls, because Charlie couldn't call Susie and Brian until he 'officially' knew. I knew Heather would call, she would know what to say even if the rest of us were struggling with getting verbs, adjectives and prepositions in the right order right now. Susie's attempts at coherent speech were still only achieving mixed results and I hadn't established if I could get anything out without crying.

Momma had left before it got light; mostly to repair the hole in the roof that she'd made to get in. She'd tried every window, but found all of them hermetically sealed shut and couldn't attract my attention to open one for her. In the end, frantic to get to me, she'd pulled off some tiles and punched a hole in the roof liner to get through.

This much I knew; Dad was in Carlisle with Jane. Will, Ben, Jake and Mom were at Aysgarth house. Jake and Mom had been to what was left of Mary's house. It was in charred ruins and screened off. The investigation teams had been in, Jess and Mary's bodies removed and things taken in evidence. Two businesses that were next to Mary's house had been demolished as they were structurally unsafe after the blast. Dad reported no change in Dan's condition but that there had been the small achievement of getting Jane in to see her husband. The transfused blood had diluted his normal scent to her and she'd been able to touch him. It was a tiny sliver of good in an otherwise cracked mirror of misery.

It was nearly lunchtime in the UK, which meant that for Grampa it would be the middle of the night and not a good time to call. But it was breakfast time on the East Coast of America; I could call my 'cousin'.

Momma had located my phone and left it on charge for me. I hadn't the presence of mind to do even that. I pulled it out of my pocket, scrolled through my contacts and hit Dad's number. I was in the kitchen, in front of Susie, I had to remember to say 'Hi Edward' and not do what I wanted to do, which was to wail down the phone to my Daddy and get him to make it all better.

It connected and Dad's soft voice came down the line. My bottom lip immediately started to wobble.

"Hi, Edward? It's Ness." I bit back tears, this wasn't pretending, this was so raw. Actually verbalising what had happened felt too much. But Dad was calm and reassuring, he told me exactly what to say. We talked for a while, him feeding me lines while he told me the latest news about Dan. He even asked me to hand the phone over to Susie then he could pass on his condolences personally. When she handed me the phone back his voice sounded off.

"Losing a child is something no parent should have to go through." He said.

"No." I answered, really not sure of what to say. I felt trapped and desperately wished his mindreading ability would work through cell phones. He was too far away from me and I wanted to say things I couldn't say to my 'cousin'. "Can I call you again later?" I suddenly blurted out. He picked up the anguished tone of my voice.

"Of course. Nessie? If it's too much we'll find some way to get you out. Don't forget that you can leave the house for a walk. Call Jake or Mom, they can meet you somewhere. The fells above Easedale are beautiful. But call me again later when you can and we'll talk. I love you Ness."

"You too." I replied, trying and only just managing to keep it casual. "I'll speak to you later."

I finished up the conversation and hung up. I'd feel much happier if he were here, in range of my head; but Jane didn't want to be anywhere other than with Dan and in her condition she needed someone with her. Dad was the one best placed to help Jane. Meanwhile, Jake and Mom were at the house, doing what they could to help Will and Ben.

But Dad had a point; I could get out of the house for some fresh air and for a walk. I didn't particularly want to go up into the hills, but I did feel that it was important to go and see the ruined house for myself. I texted Jake to tell him what I was doing and just as Tom's parents arrived, I began walking into town.

The road was strewn with broken branches. Last night's storm had dislodged more than just a few slates off the roof of the Taylor's rented house. The Taylor's roof had been fixed, but as I looked around at other houses, many were missing more than a few slates. Everything was still wet and the sky had a flat greyness to it, indicating more rain to come.

Easedale Road was quiet, very quiet. There seemed to be an absence of animal and bird life and my footsteps were the only sound. As I came around the final corner, I saw Jake come out of the drive of Aysgarth House and walk off in the direction of Mary's house. I threaded my way through the streets, walking about twenty feet behind him until I reached the place where the little row of bungalows had been.

There was a large crowd of people here. Metal fencing had been erected around the site and behind the railings ran thick blue plastic, screening the site from view. You couldn't see much of the plastic, as threaded through the metal lattice were bouquet upon bouquet of flowers. People had come to pay their respects and had left tangible evidence of having been here. When I arrived, Jake was already at the fence reading some of the cards. A photograph of Jess, taken a few years ago startled me, but drew me in. I looked at it, almost willing for her to speak to me, to come to life, laugh and tell me that this was just some terrible dream. The picture was of Jess in her school uniform. She'd probably be about fifteen and other than a degree of maturity in her face, she had changed little in the last three years. She had the same straight blonde hair, the same piercing blue eyes and the same smile that had drawn him in and melted Will's none-existent heart. The flowers had been there all night and had been battered by the storm, but the person had thoughtfully laminated the picture and the message they had written alongside it.

"_We are heartbroken! Rest in peace dearest Jess. _

_Love from Margaret, Tony and Joanna Clark." _

I moved to another one on a freshly placed bouquet.

"_I remember you as the seven year old who made enormous blue butterflies." Marion Green._

There were card after card of remembrances of Jess; people noting what they loved about her, what they remembered about her and how they could not believe what had happened. Among the many for Jess there were bouquets for Mary too. I memorised each card, in time perhaps I could share them with Will or with Ben, in the hope that it would be a comfort to know how much Jess was loved by all those who'd known her.

Jake and I converged and as we reached each other, my hand found his and we laced our fingers tightly together. I needed for him to hold me but that wasn't going to be possible here. So we did what we could, standing close together, hidden within this crowd of people.

"Hi Ness."

My head turned to the left, it was Tom. Jake and I loosened hands immediately and I felt him step gently away. Extending for nearly six inches along his right jaw, Tom had a cut that had been stuck together with wound closure tape.

"Hi. How's your face?"

"Sore, but OK. How're doing?"

I shrugged. "Not good."

"How are Susie and Brian this morning?"

"Susie's not great, I haven't seen Brian yet. Your parents had just arrived when I left."

"I'm going up there shortly. They're going to take me across to see Dan."

I smiled and nodded. Susie hadn't mentioned anything about me seeing Dan. But then again, she'd tried to put the cereal boxes in the fridge this morning, so she wasn't exactly thinking clearly right now.

"You got to the hospital OK, that night?" Tom gave me a look that left me in no doubt that he was curious about how I'd managed that.

I nodded.

"You met that guy who took you, in the pub?"

Oh crap. I nodded again.

"Susie was asking my Mum how you got over there. I thought you were going out with Dan? And so does his Mum. It was a bit odd how you disappeared that night."

Now I really did want my Dad! I didn't give any kind of reply, verbal or otherwise but Tom did not give up. He nodded towards Jake who was behind me somewhere.

"That's him isn't it? He's very distinctive. It's not often you see a bloke that tall and we don't get many Native Americans around here. Does Dan know about him?" Tom was accusatory now.

I fixed him with a steady, measured gaze. A degree of honesty was now necessary.

"Yes."

Tom held up his hands. "I know it's none of my business, but why would Dan pretend to go out with you if you've already got a bloke? Unless… You're not supposed to be with him, or he's not supposed to be here?" My face was a mask of neutrality. I gave nothing away.

"Tommy! Oh your gorgeous face!" Salvation had arrived in the unlikely form of Gem. As Gem closed in to cup Tom's face in her hands, I stepped to the side to allow myself to see Jake. He had moved off down the line of people and was continuing to read the cards. Did I need to warn him about Tom?

Gem fawned over Tom before she turned to me. Behind her were four other members of the Grasmere Coven.

"I was about to go up to the house. Susie said I can put together Jess's funeral service. Do you want to help out?" I nodded, although I knew this would be Gem's show and I'd get very little input into it. What could I do other than perhaps mention the band? I could hardly speak on behalf of her vampire mate, son and the rest of the family she'd become part of.

The group dispersed. Gem, Tom and I walked away from the floral memorial to Jess and Mary. I looked over to Jake but he wasn't looking my way. When I turned back though, Tom was and he walked with me back up the road to the house, making anodyne conversation. He knew I had secrets. If Dan were here he'd have batted Tom's concerns away, but he wasn't and I was isolated from those who could help me explain. What had seemed like such a simple thing, to grab some time with Jake, had left my secret life badly exposed when things had gone wrong.

When we reached the house, a couple more people had arrived and Brian was back; looking even more ashen faced than it was possible for a human to do. Monica was there, as was a casually dressed man who introduced himself as Tim, the local Member of Parliament.

"I'd known Mary quite well for several years." He said, making himself useful and helping me in the kitchen to fix a round of coffee and tea for everyone. "I didn't know Jess at all, but Mary was active on several local committees and always got involved with things. I'm sorry for what happened. It's not exactly a great introduction to Britain for you is it?"

I shook my head. He seemed nice, but I didn't quite trust myself not to burst into tears right now. I wanted Jake, I wanted to talk about the whole mess we'd put ourselves in. I wanted Dan to tell Tom to back off. I wanted Jess to come through the door and yell '_surprise_!' I wanted Mom, I wanted Dad, I wanted Grampa or Emmett and his really bad jokes; I wanted anybody who knew me for who I really was. The human world was too painful. In my world, people didn't suffer massive blood loss; they didn't die because they got caught in explosions. The worst that happened was that their clothes got a bit messed up. Even if bits of us got pulled off, we could be easily stuck back together again with no ill effects. How did humans cope with this endless death and suffering?

We took the drinks through. I discovered where Brian had been this morning and why he was looking even worse. He'd been to identify Mary and Jess's bodies and had returned with their valuables in small bags. There, on the coffee table was Jess's pink sapphire necklace, Will's first gift to her last Valentine's Day. It was blackened, but intact. Along with it were her watch, her phone and two rings. One was Will's father's signet ring that he'd had resized for her and the other was the ring that he'd given her for Christmas. It was a matching ring to her necklace - two diamonds between three small pink sapphires. It was this ring that Susie now picked up and inspected.

"This is Jess's? I don't remember this? When did she get it?"

Brian shook his head. "I don't know."

"Ness?" Susie handed the ring to me. "Do you know where she got this ring from?" I took it from Susie and looked at it for a moment before coming up with the answer we had decided on.

"She got in Seattle when we went shopping the other weekend."

"Oh, she did mention she'd got something to match." I handed the ring back to Susie. "It's lovely, she has quite the eye. It goes with the necklace so well." Susie suddenly dropped the ring and her shoulders shook violently as she was overcome with grief. Her friend Lesley wrapped her arms around her and Susie burrowed into her friend's cardigan. Her muffled voice wailed. "I keep talking about her like she's still here!"

There was a knock at the door and David Barrington went to open it. It was a representative of the Fire Service and Brian, along with Tim, went through to the dining room. I could hear it said that their investigations had found that the explosion had been caused by a faulty gas cooker. It seemed that Jess must have been trying to light it because she was right by it when the explosion happened. It was all very clear cut as far as the Fire Service were concerned, so it was likely that the Coroner would release their bodies tomorrow and the funeral could happen any time after that.

I excused myself from the living room and drifted back up to what was now my room. I glared at the empty bed as if it offended me and then teared up again when I noticed Jess's things scattered around it. Although I wasn't worried about Jess's phone being in the hands of her family, I knew there wouldn't be anything incriminating on there, a thought struck me and a wave of something, perhaps it was nausea suddenly washed over me. The phone message I'd left on the way to the hospital had not been answered, it was still on Jess's phone! I'd have to try and get to it and delete it. I needed Dad's help, I had left two _huge_ clues to our world and I needed him to help me take care of them. I pulled out my phone, found his number and called him. He answered immediately, but from downstairs, Susie called my name. I only had time to tell him quickly what was up.

I came back downstairs again and with Brian, Monica, Tim and the man from the Fire Service now in the living room; Susie, Gem and I went through to the dining room to start to put together Jess and Mary's funeral service.

A less fun activity I couldn't possibly have imagined and it wasn't because Susie spent most of the afternoon in tears. Gem was in sole charge of anything to do with Jess. She had the vision of what she wanted it to look like and Susie, being in no state to argue, let her get on with it. In the end, Gem ignored the last year of Jess's life. This was Gem's service and this was Gem's loss. I was seemingly an irrelevance and didn't know anything about Jess whatsoever. I kept quiet. I wanted the whole thing to be over then I could go home to Forks.

One of the benefits of your Dad being the local Vicar was that anything you wanted you pretty much got. Gem made calls, her Dad made calls and the funeral was arranged for four o'clock the next day. The cremation would be first, followed by what Gem was calling a service of celebration. It felt like anything but.

It wasn't until much later and almost dark that I managed to get out of the house again and down to Aysgarth House. Dan was now awake and Susie and Brian had rushed off to Carlisle to see him and deliver the worst news of all.

Mom came out of the kitchen to greet me and my heart nearly broke. Ben was perched on her hip and nestled against her. His eyes were red and little sobs periodically escaped him. She stroked his hair. I went to her, kissed her and kissed Ben on his forehead, rubbing his back. He put his arms out to me and I took him from Mom, balancing him on my own hip and letting him settle against my neck. I placed my hand on his back and held him to me.

"Where's Will?" I asked gently.

"He's gone to look at the cards. Jake's gone with him." I was pleased that he'd gone.

"How is he?"

"Utterly devastated." Mom looked worried. Not just sad, but worried.

"What is it?"

She shook her head and looked at Ben. Not something she wanted to discuss in front of him, clearly. I held him tighter and felt him twitch periodically with sobs.

"Any word from Dad?"

"Yes, he called earlier, they'll be back tomorrow. They haven't managed to get in to see Dan but your Dad's reassured that his head's mostly ok, if a bit confused at what's happened." A bit of confusion was understandable. I was very glad I wasn't Dad. I didn't want to know what would be going on in Dan's head when his parents told him the news about Jess.

Mom took Ben off upstairs when he fell asleep and the two of us sat on the sofa together for a while. Mom told me she was concerned that Will didn't want to be around, now Jess wasn't. Ben needed his father more than anything and the last thing she wanted was him being orphaned because Will could not face life without Jess.

That brought on more crying and exhausted from emotion I drifted off to sleep on Mom. I woke though when I heard the door. Into the living room came Jake followed by Will. A more devastated man you could not want to see. I did not know what to say, Will did not know what to say and so nothing was said.

Even being happy with Jake felt wrong right now and I couldn't respond when he kissed me. Jake understood and we just sat together for a while before he came back with me and I let myself into the dark, cold and empty house of my life without Jess.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten: Memorial**

I got out of the car. Around the edge of the road people stood and watched, as Susie and Brian followed me out and went over to another vehicle. Brian lifted Dan out of another car with difficulty and placed him a wheelchair. Perhaps it would be correct to say that this was the inert shell of Dan, there didn't appear to be anything going on inside. He had never moved once during the cremation service and his eyes didn't move now either. He looked at a point on the ground about three feet in front of him and the only movement he gave was the occasional blink. It was as if all life had left him.

Susie had insisted he was here, even though he was going straight back to the hospital in Carlisle after the service. The small group of us who had been at the Crematorium included Lesley, David and Tom Barrington, Gem and her Mum Janet, Roger who'd taken the service, the Taylor family and myself. Brian pushed the wheelchair forward and we followed behind into the church grounds. Just as I turned into the path, I noticed, stood across the road from us, were Jake, Mom, Dad holding Ben and Jane. Jane's face was a mask of horror and Dad placed his hand gently on her shoulder. Mom seemed to know this was a cue and pulled Jane to her. I could see the pain in her eyes. She wanted Dan; but this time it was not about killing him, she wanted to be with him. Yet another example of the cruelty of this life that we led - no one could be there for anyone. My eyes found Jake's and they gave me what I needed, his love to get through this.

The church was packed and adorned in a sickening sea of black and purple. The whole thing looked like a gigantic bruise. Mingled in with the Christmas decorations were incongruous strands of silver foil bats and yard after yard of black tinsel. This was Gem's idea of a memorial service for Jess turning her father's church into some gothic crypt. We sat in the pew we'd last sat in on Christmas Eve. Dan was at the end of the row, sat in the wheelchair in the aisle and I was sat furthest away from him, next to Tom.

Even if Gem had tacked on Mary as an afterthought, her Dad certainly did not and Roger Gisborne was noticeably affected by the death of someone he'd known very well. Mary had been a lifelong member of the church, she had taken a full part in everything they did and Roger spoke fulsomely in praise of her, his voice cracking as the grief broke through.

Gem led the tributes to Jess, along with the other members of the Grasmere Coven. They were dressed in black and purple, all covering their tear-reddened eyes with lashing of black eyeliner and all making me unable to look at them. I felt angry. This was nothing Jess was; this was a facsimile of her. I could only imagine the fury that would come from her if she could see this travesty to her memory. Somewhere inside me, under the onslaught of parody vampirism the real vampire arose. A vampire that was hurt, angry and wanted to lash out at this group of silly girls stood on the chancel steps. I would show them what being a real vampire was all about and it wasn't dressing up in long black clothes and flouncing about like some pathetic rag doll. My phone vibrated in my pocket, no doubt Dad telling me to calm down and not to let this get to me. I pulled out the phone and yes, it was him. Tom looked over and I hurriedly switched it off and stuffed the phone back in my pocket, trying to think of other things to calm myself.

I thought of Jake. I thought of the forest, the rivers and of the mountains of the Olympic peninsula that were our back yard. I longed for them; to be home and be out in them again with him. I yearned for Forks; for the Cullen's house, for the cottage, for the little red cabin on the reservation. For Grampa's house, for Frederick's the diner, for school even and more than anything, silly afternoons with Jess in her bedroom; laughing at some idiotic thing that had happened at school that day. Her happy face swam into my mind and my eyes correspondingly swam with tears. I wiped them quickly away with the side of my hand but it was fruitless; they didn't stop, they went right on cascading down my cheeks like the waterfalls of the Sol Duc River. Tom reached out to take hold of my hand and for some reason I didn't pull away. Right now it was what I needed; contact with someone, _anyone_ and he had given it. Who was I to be picky about what species the giver of comfort was?

Filing out again I spotted Will on the far side of the church in a corner. He didn't look at me as I passed; his eyes were firmly fixed on the floor. I didn't need to see them to know what I would find there. I wondered what he had made of Gem's tribute to Jess? He more than anyone, had a right to feel insulted by what she'd done.

It was fully dark by the time the service had finished and the congregation streamed out into the ice cold night. Lights in the wall around the churchyard illuminated the grass with pools of yellow light. Brian and Susie were talking to people, each person wanting a few minutes of their time to try and offer what comfort they could. Tom had knelt down by Dan trying to talk to him, but Dan didn't appear to be in a very talkative mood. I understood that, I wasn't in a talkative mood either. I retreated under the dark shadows of a yew tree to wait for them.

"Ness!" Came the angry hiss from above. "What is the point of you having a phone if you switch it off?"

I turned around and looked briefly upwards into the tree, catching the face of my Dad looking down at me from a high branch.

"I was handling it! " I hissed in return.

"That's not what I was calling you about. I need you to go and see Fiona."

"Fiona?"

"Freaky."

"I know who she is. I'm just querying why you want me to go see her? She's not here; she's at her Uncle's."

"She's back and I need you to get something out of her head."

I looked around the remaining people leaving the church. "I haven't seen her."

"She's not here, she's at home. She didn't come because she's too scared."

"Sounds like Freaky." I rolled my eyes.

"She's not scared of the church; she's scared of a pair of red eyes."

"What?"

"Look out!"

"Are you talking to trees now?" Tom's voice made me almost jump. I turned around and looked at him, he looked amused. "Mysterious men? Clandestine meetings? Talking to trees? You'll get on well with Freaky."

I said nothing; I just looked at him with a blank expression.

"Are you coming over to the Vicarage? The Gisborne's are putting on some food. Brian and Susie are taking Dan back to Carlisle, but I'll look after you."

I shook my head. "No."

"Are you going back to the house? We could go to the pub if you want? I don't really want to go and hang around with that lot." He seemed to be trying to put me at my ease instead of accusing me of something all the time.

"Thanks, but I'd prefer to be on my own." I said.

"Are you meeting up with that guy?"

I fixed him with a look of greater intensity; this was not going to die down without some intervention. "No, I _want_ to be on my own."

Tom blinked as if dazzled by imaginary bright lights. Above me I heard the quietest of chuckles.

"Fair enough." He replied and started to back away. "I'll… see you about."

"Yeah. Bye." I watched him leave, walking down the path at speed and shoving his hands into the pockets of his black jeans.

"Ness?" I turned back around to see Susie standing there. "We're taking Dan back to the hospital. Here's the door key." I took the key from her. "Help yourself to something from the fridge for tea, Brian and I'll get something in Carlisle. We'll see you later."

I said goodbye and tried to catch Dan's eye as they wheeled him past, but he was still in an almost catatonic state. I turned back to the tree.

"Meet me by the Oak Bank Hotel." Dad said. The tree shook slightly as he sprang out of it, unseen by those few people still leaving the church.

I left the churchyard and walked through the quiet roads of Grasmere until I came to the hotel. Dad was sat on a stone wall on the far side of the car park. As I reached him he stood up and hugged me. I allowed myself to relax and let go of some of the tension that had taken up residence in my shoulders. I heard the footsteps of two people walking along the road.

"Aww, young love." The older man said of us as they passed

I pulled a face.

Dad laughed. "They will never understand us." He kissed my forehead.

"Freaky's seen red eyes?"

Dad sat back down and I sat down beside him.

"I don't know when, I only got flashes of what she was remembering."

"Lots of people see the occasional vampire."

"They do, but this is significant. Fiona's bedroom window looks out over what was Mary's back yard. She saw the vampire at Mary's door."

I looked at Dad, incredulous at what I was hearing. "Are you serious? Freaky could just be imagining stuff. All those girls look like they have over-active imaginations."

"Perhaps they have, but from what little I've seen, I think the reason Fiona looks so frightened all the time is that she knows that there's every reason to be. She's seen what the others only dream of and it scares her. She arrived home a little while ago. When she was told what had happened, her mind lit up like a Christmas tree, with the biggest pair of cold scarlet eyes." He snickered. "I'm no superhero, but that was almost like seeing the bat signal. And then of course, you pick that moment to want to kill the girls in church, so I'm trying to work out if I call you about Fiona's head or your head. And you switch your phone off!" He grinned at me.

"I was in church!" I laughed. "I reined it back in, though."

"You did, admirably. We'll be home soon. But first, I want to find out why Mary Burton had a vampire at her door and I want to know what Fiona Sawbridge knows about vampires." Dad looked at me, his face now serious. "Only you can do this Ness, nobody else. Do you want to try?"

"What do you need me to do?"

"Get Fiona to talk about what she's seen, hopefully she'll picture it in her mind and I can see more clearly what she knows."

"Do you think it has something to do with Jess and Mary's deaths?"

"I don't know." He sighed. "But vampires don't just show up at people's houses, they're not stray cats looking for a bowl of milk. He would be there for a reason."

"Do you think Jess and Mary were killed by a vampire?"

"It's not outside the bounds of possibility and if so, Will needs to have the right to face whoever killed his mate. I'm not going to pressure you, but will you have a go at this?"

I didn't really need to think. If this vampire had killed Jess then I would be in the queue behind Will to avenge Jess's death too. "Yes!" I said with absolute certainty. "Now?"

"No time like the present."


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven: Scarlet and Black**

Fiona's curtains were drawn in front of the sheets of plywood that were her temporary windows. They'd been blown out by the explosion and the glazier wasn't coming until tomorrow. She indicated that I should sit in the purple plastic inflatable chair while she sat on her bed, looking even more frightened than when I'd seen her in the pub before Christmas. The last thing Dad had said to me before I walked up to her front door was not to call her Freaky; she didn't like it.

"Gem made the service very personal to Jess. There can't be many church funeral services that have a vampire theme." It was a factual, but provocative opening statement.

Fiona's expression totally changed. Where there was fear there was now derision.

"Vampires! What Gemma Gisborne knows about vampires could be written on a postage stamp. No, half a postage stamp come to think of it. She _thinks_ she knows about vampires. Ha!"

I was going to ask whether Fiona knew about vampires, but I didn't need to open my mouth, she took a breath and carried straight on. There was an awful lot of anger here.

"Gem and the rest of them, including Jess, think that vampires are a bunch of sexy blokes who might take a shine to you, sweep you off your feet and whip you away from all this tedium. Well that's just bollocks. Vampires aren't interested in having a meaningful conversation; they just want to kill you. It's what they do and you're an idiot if you think anything else."

"But I thought you were part of that group?"

"I am, but I only hang around with them to fit in. You don't live around here, you don't know what it's like if you don't fit in, if you don't conform." I knew rather more about trying to fit in than I was going to admit to. "Did Jess fit in, in America I mean?"

"No never."

"Odd, I'd have put her down as someone who'd have taken one look at things and blended right into the woodwork."

"It was what I liked about her that she didn't try and fit in. She knew who she was and she didn't care if anyone a problem with that."

"She's changed then. She was always a bit of a sheep here, did everything Gem said. Mind you, they all do. As you might have worked out, Gem's the one in charge around here."

"The Alpha female? Absolutely."

Fiona laughed. "Alpha female, that's a good description of her. Makes her sound like a dog – which she is. She can be a right bitch at times."

"So you don't subscribe to the vampire obsession?"

"No. _Vampire Nights_ is shit anyway. My interest in vampires is purely academic." Fiona got up and pulled a folder out from her bookcase. She sat back down and opened it. "I study them."

"You believe they exist."

Fiona Sawbridge looked me straight in the eye. "Of _course_ they exist."

Mine did not waver, either. "How do you know?"

Fiona's eyes locked on mine. "I've seen one. The same one, three times actually."

"You've seen one?" I hoped Dad was getting what he needed, because Fiona was being pretty candid with me. I sat forward, not just pretending to be interested, I was genuinely interested; but also genuinely fearful. The Volturi weren't keen on people 'studying' vampires. People who studied vampires tended to get too close to the truth and had a habit of disappearing.

"Where did you see it?"

"He. It's a man, out of my bedroom window. It's fascinating! He visits Mary Burton, or he did visit Mary Burton. I guess he won't be coming back now, he's got what he wanted."

"What do you mean?"

Fiona turned the pages over in the file and handed it to me. "I think he wanted Jess."

The page Fiona handed to me was a photocopy from a book. On it was a poem and underneath it a black and white drawing of a young woman. She was dressed simply in a long plain dress, over the top of which was a white apron. It looked like the drawing of someone from the nineteenth century, but there was an uncanny likeness to Jess. Same large eyes that drew you in and long, straight, blonde hair which in the picture, streamed out behind the woman as if caught in the wind.

"Read the lyrics."

"Lyrics? It's not a poem?"

"No, it's a local folk song. It's about a young woman who caught the eye of a mysterious man. He always watched for her, hiding by a tree in Easedale Valley. He loved her but never found the courage to introduce himself to her. And then one day, she wasn't there and he discovered she'd been murdered by her new husband, shortly after giving birth to her daughter. He vowed revenge on the man but never found him. He'd fled the area."

I looked at the title of the song and committed the lyrics to memory. "Bright Susannah?" I commented on the title.

"Yes, she was as gleaming and glorious as the sun to him. She made him feel alive."

"Who wrote the song?"

Fiona smiled. "I don't know. I'm given to think he did to be honest. Occasionally it gets played at the local folk group meetings. I've been to some, wanting to hear it. I always look around the pub, see if there's some shadowy figure sat in the corner listening. But there never is."

"So you think the vampire came for Jess because she looks like Susannah?"

"Yes, basically."

"How would he know where to look?"

"Turn over the page."

I followed Fiona's instruction and turned over the page in the folder. There was a family tree with Jess at the bottom, going back up from Susie (Susannah!) Burton, to Mary, to Edith Grant, Emily Hodgson, Ruth Bowman, Alice Collins and finally to Susannah Collins.

"Jess was descended from her?"

"Yes. I suspect he's been keeping tabs on the women in the family. I think Mary knew him a long time and knew his story; why else would she call her own daughter Susannah?" Fiona had the look of someone who'd discovered every theory she'd ever had on something had just been proved, beyond doubt.

"You think Mary had been trying to help him meet another Susannah and it went wrong and he killed them?"

Fiona looked at me. "Or it went right and that wasn't Jess."

"It was Jess."

"Are you sure?"

"Brian identified her body."

"Oh…" Fiona sighed and she visibly slumped. "I was starting to hope that Jess might still be alive. But vampires kill. They're not nice creatures."

I turned over the page in the folder, looking at what else she written about and the approximation of blood in my veins almost ran cold. I looked at the word and the notes Fiona had made underneath. I was both fascinated and horror-struck. Why wouldn't I be, the subject was me – or, what I was. My interest must have given me away.

"Are you reading the stuff on the Dhampir? That's my new project. Fascinating things! They have a vampire father and a human mother. They are half-breeds straddling two worlds. Never quite fitting into either. True misfits."

"Dhampir?" The word was strange. I knew pretty much everything about my heritage but this word was unfamiliar. I had never seen it before. In my pocket my phone rang. I had to force myself to look away to answer the call. It was Dad. I answered and put the phone to my ear. "Hello."

"I have enough. You can wrap it up now." I queried the page I was reading, in my head. "We'll talk about that. I'll come and find you when you leave."

We exchange a false conversation about the funeral service and I finished the call. I handed the folder back to Fiona and she placed it back on her shelf. I didn't want to know the full extent of what she knew, that sort of information in the wrong hands could put Fiona's life in danger.

I didn't stay too much longer and walked almost numbly away from Fiona's house. The information about the vampire who had been meeting with Mary was one thing, but the horrible description of the Dhampir was what had really made me feel ill. I walked back along the road and soon heard the familiar sound of Dad's footsteps behind me. I slowed a little and allowed him to gain on me.

"Come back to the house." He said. "There is much to discuss." We walked side by side back into the drive of Aysgarth House and the second we were out of sight Dad's arm went around my shoulders. "Well done, but yes, your worries about her are not misplaced. She is getting herself into a dangerous situation." The door was flung open and Mom came out to meet us. Her face displayed instant concern.

"What's the matter?"

"Nessie has found some information that has upset her. Also, there is something we need to talk about regarding Mary and Jess. Where's Will?"

"He's out with Ben; I think they've gone up the valley."

Dad pulled out his phone and called Will.

"He needs to come back."

Twenty minutes later Dad, Mom, Will, Ben, Jane, Jake and I were all sat around the kitchen table. Dad kept looking at Jane and he was clearly worried about her. She looked deeply uneasy. He looked away and took a deep breath.

"It would appear, from what Ness has discovered this afternoon, that there's a vampire in this area who has been keeping tabs on Jess's family. In particular, the female descendents of a woman he was once in love with, who was killed. Jess was similar in appearance to this woman, Susannah Collins. Her theory, based on her own discoveries, is that Mary was fully aware of this vampire and may have been trying to enable him to meet someone who was as close has he could get to Susannah.

"You're saying that Jess was killed by a vampire?" Will's eyes took on a murderous quality.

"No, I'm not saying that, this is still more than likely a tragic accident, but; a vampire has been visiting Mary Burton at points over the last ten years and I, for one, would like to know why.

"Fiona first saw him when she was about eight, again when she was twelve and most recently about eighteen months ago. If nothing else we should establish why this vampire was in contact with Mary. He may have nothing to do with their deaths, but it's curious don't you think, that Jess isn't the only one in the family with links to a vampire?"

"Well who is he? How do we find him?"

I got the impression Will wasn't just out for knowledge, in his mind this vampire had killed Jess and he was already out for revenge. I was surprised then, that instead of the concern I expected to see on my father's face, there was almost a smile.

"In this we are strangely fortunate. Ness getting Fiona to talk about what she'd seen, gave me the image of him in her mind and it's someone I've met before."

For the first time since she'd been here, Jane was suddenly alert and excited. "Demetri can find him!" Her face burst into a smile.

"That's right! Demetri can find him."

"Because if you want someone found, you get Demetri. He's the best!" Jane had come alive and she was back to her excited-about-life self.

"Demetri's a tracker." Dad explained to Will. "The best tracker of our kind. He finds people by the flavour of their minds."

"So does Demetri know him?" Asked Will.

"No. But I do, or rather I've met him, which is all Demetri needs. He can pick up whatever he needs to track him, from my mind."

"So who are we looking for?" Asked Jake.

Dad looked almost triumphant. "We're looking for Alistair."

Jake's shoulders sagged. "Oh great, Mr Personality. That'll be fun." Mom, Dad and I sniggered.

Alistair I'd only met once and discovered him, like everyone else did, to be a recalcitrant man. He was an English nomadic vampire who distrusted everybody, including the infant me. When he paid The Cullen's a brief visit, back when they were assembling a group of witnesses to prove to the Volturi that I was not a danger (incidents with vodka excepted); Alistair had initially been part of that group. Well, not so much part of, as having a loose association with. He holed up in the attic and didn't come out. When the time drew near for the Volturi's arrival, he bailed on us and that was the last we'd seen of him. But here he was, entwined like a serpent around Jess's family tree. Dad wasn't the only one; I too would like to know why Alistair was visiting Mary Burton. It sounded very much like Jess would have met vampires regardless of which country she'd been in.

Jane was immediately on the phone trying to track down Demetri. Like her, he'd left the Volturi when Aro's empire-building had got too much and vampires didn't habitually carry cell phones; but she hoped that someone may have seen him. While she called various people, Jake and I gravitated over to one another.

"I'm not going to want to pay that bill when it comes in. She's called Iceland, Norway and Bolivia in the last five minutes."

"She's doing what she can and she's a girl with contacts." I sighed. She'd been around for over twelve hundred years and her address book must be totally mental. Carlisle's was bad enough.

"So; Alistair, huh? What's a good Christian woman like Mary Burton doing hanging out with a vampire and not even a vegetarian one at that?"

I looked at him and grinned. "Bible study?" We laughed. "I don't know…"

"Ness!" Came a shout of reproach from upstairs, as my head imagined something other than Bible study going on between Mary and Alistair. Jake sniggered and then looked uncomfortable.

"Oops. Sorry." The colour drained out of his face.

I looked immediately at him. "What?"

Dad was suddenly in front of me, eyes blazing and an expression on his face that I had seen before and did not like. I wasn't stupid; I knew full well what he'd seen in Jake's mind. My eyes dropped to the floor.

There was an uncomfortable silence between us for the longest time. I braced myself for the tidal wave of anger, but it did not come. Mom came in to the room, I guessed because Dad has suddenly vanished from wherever he'd been upstairs and she wanted to know why that was.

"Edward? Is there something wrong?"

I was still looking at the floor, studying the pattern on the carpet.

I heard him sigh. "No, just something we need to talk about. Jake? Excuse us. Ness, could your Mom and I have a word, please?"

I got up and followed Dad upstairs. Mom shut the door of their bedroom behind us. Everybody would hear what was being said anyway, but it was an attempt at some sort of familial privacy. I sat down on the bed. Mom and Dad stood in front of me.

"Edward? What's the matter? Is there something wrong with Nessie?"

I might as well come out with it, there was no point denying it.

"Mom, Jake and I, we…" I didn't finish.

"Oh my God, are you pregnant?" Mom grasped my shoulders, staring into my eyes trying to suck the answer out of them.

"What? No!"

"Are you sure?" She went on without pause. "Did you do a test? Edward get the pregnancy test kit!"

"You've… what? Mom! I'm _not_ pregnant!"

Mom looked to Dad, her faced etched with concern. "Edward is she pregnant?"

"I don't know. I'll get the kit."

"No Dad, don't!" I shouted. "There's no need" Did I have to spell this out? "I am _not_ pregnant! Why the obsession with this?" I was expecting to get roasted for having had sex, not for possibly being pregnant already. Why'd they jump to that immediate conclusion?

"You don't have our perspective on this. Our early efforts resulted in you and…" Dad tailed off and ran his hands through his hair, grabbing large handfuls of it. He looked at me, his face a mixture of worry and annoyance. "Oh Ness." Mom hugged me and sat down beside me on the bed. "I'm sorry. There's been so much circulating tension the last few days that this just got thrown in the pot and stirred right in - another thing to deal with. Fractured relationships, serious injury, death and pregnant daughters…"

"Mom, I'm _not_ pregnant, please stop saying that!"

"But how do you know? We don't know how your body works; we don't know how these things develop…"

I cut her off. "We used protection!" I yelled and correspondingly turned scarlet at having to talk about this. There was an uncomfortable silence, which I broke. "I am not stupid," I said calmly. "I go to school. I hear the safe sex message like everyone else."

"That's good."

"I know you see things differently, but Jake and I…"

"I'm well aware of how you feel about him." Dad said. "You had the opportunity and you took it."

"Yeah. I'm sorry. But…"

"There's no need to apologise Ness." Dad sat down on the bed beside me. "With you two it was only ever a matter of time."

That was even worse! I looked at him, appalled. "You and Mom have been talking about this?"

"We've all talked about it."

I gasped searching for words that were themselves in shock, knowing that my entire family had been discussing my reproductive capabilities and probably while I was asleep.

"While you were out with Jake, actually."

"Dad!"

Mom tried to make it better. "Ness you are such an unknown quantity, we don't know how things are going to work with you, or if they're going to work at all. We need to be prepared."

She made it sound like something FEMA might be involved in.

"Ness, it isn't like that." Dad said, using a softer tone of voice. "We're just concerned. Also, getting pregnant while you're still in High School wouldn't be the best time."

"I'm hardly going there for my education." I knew everything already.

Dad snickered and ruffled my hair.

"You're such a typical teen."

"What?"

"You think you know everything." He grinned.

I had to laugh. "Well I do know everything. Everything I need to know for school is already in my head. I only go there to hang out with friends."

"Hanging out with friends is a good thing. Do that, a _lot_. Enjoy it. Leave the getting pregnant thing 'til later. Preferably 'til you're married."

I narrowed my eyes; we were back to this, again.

"Dad will you stop this obsession with me getting pregnant? Perhaps if you'd listened to the safe sex message in school, you might have gotten some time with Mom, instead of getting her pregnant on your wedding night!" I laughed, but he didn't see the joke. Dad's face darkened and Mom took exception to my swipe.

"Ness, that's not fair. How were we supposed to know? You are blissfully unaware of the trauma we all went through and excuse us, but we're only trying to make sure it doesn't happen again. That was no fun for anybody, least of all your father; having to watch me go through that with no idea of how to help me. When it happens, or _if_ it happens with you we don't want to be as unprepared as we were back then. Don't forget; if it weren't for all the things we learned the first time around, Ben's birth may not have been the happy event that it was."

"Mom, all the other hybrids we know are infertile, you can't wait for one of Nahuel's sister's to get pregnant first, that isn't going to happen."

"I know and I know you're unique in that. But please could you just do this in the right order? Can you do the whole meet Jake, fall in love, get married and _then_ get pregnant instead of doing it all backwards? It'll give us some time to… get used to being grandparents, if nothing else." Mom looked over to Dad. "Also, getting pregnant when you don't appear to have a boyfriend would open you up to some unkind comments. I don't want that for you. Girls can be complete bitches at times. This I know."

There was a pause and downstairs Ben started to cry.

"Look." Mom pulled me close. "We didn't come down in the last shower. If you're going to do it with Jake - and we understand that stronger things are at work in your lives than just natural attraction - will you keep being safe?"

I nodded.

"That doesn't give you carte blanche to… sleep with him all the time." Said Dad.

Huh? I was getting mixed messages here.

Dad pinched the bridge of his nose and a small smile appeared. "Could I… Get out of the way first?"

I ran with that. "Yeah, you should totally move to Portland." I grinned at him and then something Fiona had said the first time I met her popped right into my head.

If it was possible to look ashen faced, my Dad did. "Four!"

"That's what she said."

"What?" Mom was always slightly on the back foot with us two.

I looked at her. "Fiona said I was going to have four children."

The returned smile was as wide and as sunny as a Caribbean sky. "I hope that comes true and nobody will love their grandchildren more than we will. But could we get you out of school first?"

I nodded.

There was something from earlier that I wanted to talk about.

"Dad, why don't I know the term Dhampir?"

He sighed. "It's not a label that any of our family thinks applies to you. You're not what that is. You are not some nomadic, malevolent, tortured creature that roams the world looking for vengeance on vampires and humans. You are loved, you have a family, you love someone and you have so much potential in you. Perhaps we were wrong not to tell you about it, to keep it from you; but we decided that we didn't want your life to ever conform to a set of parameters invented by humans, who haven't a clue what they're talking about and certainly don't know you. I'm sorry if you think we done something wrong."

"No, not at all. What upset me was that it was so… awful."

"Then we were right to keep it from you. Please don't think about it again. It doesn't apply to you."

Dad suddenly stood up quickly. "Jane's discovered where Demetri is. She needs help getting to France!"

The three of us sped back downstairs to continue the hunt for Alistair.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve: Inertia**

Waiting for Demetri was by far the worst thing and it wasn't because there was nothing to do. There was one thing I was doing more than anything right now and that was avoiding Susie.

Having left with Jane for the nearest airport so she could get to France, the absence of Dad meant that Jake and I could talk about what had just gone on. I got so wrapped up in him – literally – that I lost track of the time and ended up running out of the drive of Aysgarth House and right into the Taylor's car as it was returning from the hospital.

It had been an awkward conversation and Susie was absolutely convinced now that I was seeing another guy behind Dan's back and she was not having it.

I couldn't go out anywhere. Any attempt to 'just go for a walk' would be taken as an attempt to meet up with this guy. I had to stay in the house and preferably in sight of Susie then I wasn't tempted to be calling whoever he was. Susie had been talking to Tom or Tom's Mum and had been given the description of a 'very tall native American.' Susie put two and two together and got four.

"The guy who runs the car repair place in Forks, is it him? Is he here? If I call Charlie right now will he tell me that the garage is shut for Christmas and that Jake Black's on vacation?"

I didn't answer; this was not supposed to happen. Not Jess, not Dan and not anyone finding out about Jake in this way. We planned how it would be and it wasn't like this! Susie's expression set as hard as stone and she put her hands on her hips.

"I take a very dim view of anybody who hurts my children. Dan is very fragile, we're not even sure of the extent of the damage yet, but you are not going to mess him about while he can't do anything about it. So whatever you're doing, whoever you're seeing, stop it! You will be there for Dan until such time as he says otherwise, do you hear me? Or you and this man can get yourselves on a plane back to Forks right now and I never want to see you again. Does Charlie know about this?" She continued.

I shook my head.

"He's a bit old for you if you are seeing him."

I didn't respond.

"You've always been such a nice girl and now… I don't know what to make of you." She shook her head, as if she were trying to expel a bad thought. "I think you and I should stay away from each other for a while."

So here I was, marooned in the living room, keeping in sight, but not in actual sight and doing my best 'being human.' I was even reading at human speed, which was making my brain hurt.

To make matters worse it was New Year's Eve and what should have been the potential of a bright, shining year of gloriousness starting tomorrow, was already starting to look a bit sad and sorry for itself. There would be no Jess for one thing. Will and Ben would be in enormous pain. Dan was in who knew what state right now and even the potential of something wonderful with Jake was now looking a bit tarnished. Susie Taylor would believe I ditched her son for him and my family were obsessed with me getting pregnant by him. Add to that finals and graduation and I was thinking of finding a way to fast forward through the whole lot of it. Why was life never easy?

I was coming to the opinion that whoever delivers you, should take you aside; look deep into your eyes and say: 'Welcome to your life kid; this is going to hurt.' That way, you'd be under no illusions that it would be a barrel of laughs.

To be fair, life had only hurt once I'd started mixing more widely with humans. Up until that point and excluding the horrible bit with the Volturi in those first few months of my life, it had been a barrel of laughs, mixed in with a lot of love. Pain wasn't something I'd experienced much of, unless it was from laughing. I'd frequently had to be packed off to bed when Emmett or Jasper had wound me up into a state of hysterical stupidity. Those days seemed so long ago, but I longed for them.

A sadness settled over our family with the absence of Jess. Will, Ben and Dan would require a lot of care and I was sure that Jane would be desperate to attempt a human life, just so she could spend all her time with him and not just live in his bedroom and drag him into the janitor's closet at school. I half expected there to be a new girl in our grade after we returned from the Christmas vacation. That would be one way of getting out of this whole Dan and Jake mess that had sprung up. If I hadn't followed my heart and gone to find Jake that night, then Tom wouldn't have known that we knew each other. Stupid girl! I chastised myself and settled back into my book.

The living room door opened and Brian came in.

"We're going to collect Dan from hospital. Susie wanted to know if you'd like to come?" She didn't want me there; she just wanted to make sure I wasn't sneaking off down the road to Aysgarth House while they were out.

"Yes, I'll come." I put the marker in my book and hauled myself, very humanly, off the sofa.

When we arrived, Dan was already sat by the bed in a wheelchair ready to go. His elbows were resting on the arms and he looked deep in thought, which he didn't break out of as his parents went to him. I hung back, unsure of what to say, of what to do, even. Was I going to have to keep up the whole girlfriend charade and kiss him? In the end that was a yes, I got the impression Susie expected it. I leaned in towards Dan's blank face. I half expected an amused grin, but as our lips made the briefest of touches there was nothing from him. He was Jess's twin and her loss must affect him in ways we could only guess at. The three of us walked down the gleaming corridors of the hospital with Brian pushing Dan and Susie and I walking behind, not speaking to each other and not looking at each other.

As the car pulled away from the hospital there was finally a reaction from Dan. He reached across, took my hand before turning his head away and looking out of the window for the entire journey home.

But evening gave us talking time. Brian and Susie went down to David and Lesley's house, having decided they couldn't face seeing in the New Year in the pub with everyone else. Tom wanted to come up but Dan said no, he wanted to spend the evening with me.

A tiny bedside light was the only illumination in the room. Dan was nestling against a massive bank of pillows and I sat cross-legged at the other end of the bed. I'd told him what we'd discovered from Fiona and he was just processing that. Periodically his phone beeped, it was Jane. The hospital's ban on phones in High Dependency Units meant that this was the first chance they'd had to catch up. She hadn't found Demetri yet and she was missing Dan dreadfully. She couldn't talk as she was in the attic of someone's house sheltering from a storm. Text was the next best thing.

"So Edward doesn't think Jess was killed by this vampire, but Will does?"

"Dad hasn't detected the scent of vampires in the area, he doesn't think Alistair was involved; but I think Will's looking for someone to blame. I just hope nothing happens to Will if he fights whoever it is, I don't want to have to explain to Ben that he's lost both his parents."

"Yeah, well that's not really going to happen is it? Will wouldn't orphan his own son just to avenge Jess's death?"

I shrugged. "I think it's possible people's judgements can be clouded if they hurt enough. What do you think about your Grandma being involved?"

Dan shook his head and sighed. "I really don't know, other than knowing she was the biggest hypocrite on the planet if she really was going to church and entertaining vampires behind everyone's backs."

"It looks like she didn't have a choice; Alistair was keeping tabs on the women in your family."

"She could have told him to bugger off."

"Do you think your Mum knew anything about it, do you think she's involved?"

"She doesn't come across as if she does. She always had a slightly bored reaction to Jess's interest in vampires; whereas, now to come to think of it, Grandma was always the one encouraging it and mentioning it. Just like Christmas Day. Always giving that impression that it was a harmless childish phase that Jess would grow out of, but she was right there, talking about it with her. Maybe Jess was down there for some handover ceremony? You know, a 'who's this knocking on the door at this time of night, titter, titter. Oh do come in… May be Grandma didn't want to give Jess jewellery, but get her there and introduce her to the vampire, as some mad family inheritance she was getting. 'Yeah, you can have my rings and necklaces, oh and by the way you'll have to look after Mr Frosty here. He's no bother, just wear polo-neck jumpers when he comes round.'" Dan parodied the voice of a little old lady. "God knows what she was thinking of in meeting with a vampire. Not even a veggie one either, a proper sodding carnivorous one! Talk about playing with fire.

"If he did meet Jess and… I was going to say get sucked in, but that's really not the right phrase. You know what I mean, her eyes seemed to do mad things to vampires. What if Jess was his singer and he did to Jess what Jane did to those two people at Woburn Safari Park?"

"Singers are very rare. Jane was over twelve hundred years old before she got one. Carlisle's never had one. Dad was a hundred and eight before Mom showed up. It was only Emmett that got one in his early years. It's unlikely Jess was a singer."

"Yes but you can't discount that possibility."

"No. But let's see what he has to say when Demetri finds him. He may know nothing about it and be just as upset that we are that your Grandma's dead and the line of women from Susannah Collins has finished. Maybe he liked your Grandma and was trying to find a way overcome what he was?"

"He should have tried what the Cullens do."

"Not everybody finds it easy or palatable."

"Well Jane's managed it."

"Starting again is hard, I believe."

"Yes, but she's done it."

I smiled. "Because of you. Honestly, you talk about what Jess does to vampires; you have a pretty significant impact on them too."

"Just Jane, she's the only one I want to be having an impact on. I don't fancy fighting a load of vampire fan-girls off!"

I laughed. "No Jane would be the one fighting them off and using the scary 'burning your brain' power that she has."

"She's never used it on me."

"Well may be if you don't keep your side of the bed tidy, she might have to!"

He grinned for a moment and then the smile vanished.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"I shouldn't smile. Being happy about Jane being back to normal is wrong. Will and Ben won't get the chance for things to be back to normal."

"I know. But sometimes you have to just celebrate where you can. Jess wouldn't want you to be miserable."

Dan furrowed his brow. "Yes she bloody would! That's my sister you're talking about, not someone who actually liked me!"

We talked onwards to midnight. As the clock hands moved together and the New Year approached, Dan suddenly held his arms out to me.

"Come here."

"Why?"

"Well, you can't be with Jake tonight and I can't be with Jane and… No! You can take that look of horror off your face Ness; I am not suggesting that, I'm a married man! But, it's New Year's Eve and we're sat here talking about death, separation and you getting busted by your parents for getting it on with your bloke. You look like you need a hug and God knows I do after the last week. So, a no-strings-attached, brotherly hug on offer. What do you think?"

I grinned. "How can I refuse?"

"And if my parents could walk in right about now I could put them straight on this whole mysterious bloke thing that's blown up."

I cuddled up in Dan's arms, leaning against the side of him that wasn't still bandaged. He pulled away and looked down at me. "You know? You may be the most intelligent girl in the school, but you really do know jack shit about the ferreting capabilities of the average human mother. Mine makes what your Dad does look like a parlour trick." I laughed. "My Mum's the world champion at jumping to conclusions and you need to wise up to that."

"I know, but this time she's right."

"She's always right; you just need to cover it up better. A vampire has been living in my bedroom full time since July, and she's never once noticed."

"She's noticed the lack of mess."

"I know, I'm trying to work on that with Jane, but Jane doesn't like mess."

"She also doesn't like it when you eat garlic."

Dan looked horrified. "It doesn't really ward off vampires, does it?"

I grinned. "No, but it does make you taste funny when she kisses you."

"Getting my Mum to cook without garlic might be a tough… Hey why are you and Jane talking about me?"

"Oh I wasn't, she was talking to my Mom, getting some advice. I was just eavesdropping."

"And what did your Mum suggest?"

"That you start doing the cooking."

"What? I'm having words with your mother when I next see her. Me? Cook?"

"As bad as my Grandpa?"

"Yeah, we're talking that level of awfulness."

There was a key in the lock just as the clock reached midnight. In the distance the sounds of celebratory fireworks could be heard; Brian and Susie came home but there were no celebrations here, Susie was weeping. Dan held me tighter and a few seconds later I felt his ribcage start to shudder, as he finally let out his grief. I held him tighter back.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen: Under Raven Crag **

From Grasmere we ran slightly northeast across the fells, through gale force winds and driving rain. We went up from Blea Rigg, over High Raise and followed the edge as it passed over the peaks of Ullscarf, High Trove and High Seat. Dad was in the lead followed by Will, Jake in his wolf form and myself. Mom remained at the house with Ben and Dan remained in bed at the house ready to cover for me.

Jane had made contact with Demetri on New Year's Day and they had taken a day to get back. Time was now of the essence, as tomorrow Dan and I were flying back to Seattle.

It had been an awkward New Year's Day. Susie didn't trust me and it was obvious from her expression that she did not believe for one minute any visible display of affection I made to Dan. She looked at him sadly when he tried to be affectionate to me in return. I told him she didn't believe me and his response was to tell me to work harder at it. He even ditched the polite peck on the cheek for pulling me down on to the sofa for a full on kiss. That was bad enough, what was worse was the text message from Dad, essentially laughing down the phone, because my brain was trying to turn itself inside out whilst being made to kiss Dan.

There wasn't time to lose, so Jane and Demetri got close enough to Dad to sense the flavour of Alistair's mind and set off immediately on the hunt for him. We were somewhat stunned to receive a call only a few hours later to say that he'd found him. He was still in Cumbria, in the north of the county.

I was there because of my talent to be able to pass my thoughts on. If Dad had got his way I wouldn't be here, it would be him Will and Jake; but Dan wanted to be able to see what this Alistair looked like, this man who was a very secret part of his Grandma's life and so reluctantly, Dad agreed to me being there. In this weather, I'd rather not have been there, but it was the least I could do to help Dan.

We came off the ridge. To the left were the lights of Keswick; whilst ahead of us was our destination, the ancient stone circle at Castlerigg where we were to meet up with Jane and Demetri. It was a miserable night and Dan had commented it was perfect weather for hunting vampires. It did feel as if we were hunting the very devil himself. Castlerigg was still a couple of miles away from where Demetri had traced Alistair; but it was a convenient, easy visible location at which to meet up before we went in.

As the four of us ran in to the circle and slowed to a halt. Demetri stepped out from behind the largest stone monolith. Originally from Greece, Demetri was tall and lean and his shoulder-length black hair was being whipped across his face by the wind, not something that appeared to bother him in the slightest. That would drive me nuts and my hair was tied firmly back. The rest of me was encased in Gore-Tex outdoor clothing, as were the rest of us, apart from Jake whose coat was already sodden with rainwater. I was carrying a set of clothes for him if we needed to pretend to be a group of hikers out in such insane weather, but it was unlikely. Most humans would shy away from being out at night in this. Demetri, however cared nothing for such conventions and stood there in shorts and a t-shirt.

"Where's Jane?" My Dad asked.

"I thought she was coming with you?" Replied Demetri.

"Likewise!"

"No, she said she would meet up with you guys and perhaps call in on her husband first."

I rarely heard my father swear and when he did, it was really shocking. He did so at that moment, which put all of us on edge. He pulled out his phone, found who he was after and put the phone to his ear.

"Edward, what's the problem?" Will pushed back the hood of his jacket.

"Before she left, Jane's head was coming up with scenarios that I didn't like."

"What kind of scenarios?"

"Worse case? That she tries to start Dan's conversion and she can't release him. Dammit I can't get a signal! Anyone else get one?" We all pulled out our phones. "Ness call your Mom if you can, tell her to go down to Dan and make sure Jane doesn't try to convert him."

"OK!"

"Will, keep trying Jane. If you get her, insist she doesn't try to convert him. There's been enough death in this family without having to extricate Dan on the fly. I'm going to try Alice, get her to tell me if she sees any change in his future."

The three of us stood there for several minutes trying to get out phones to connect, but nothing was connecting here, so in the end we hung up and hoped like hell Jane wasn't going to attempt to convert Dan tonight. Anyhow, we had other things to do, namely find out why Mary Burton was being visited by a vampire.

Demetri guided us in over the last few miles, skirting the base of the mountain of Blencathra. Finally we came to a stop, a short distance from an isolated farmhouse, nestling the in the shadow of Raven Crag.

"He's in there." Demetri pointed to a well maintained farmhouse. It wasn't the tumbledown house I was expecting. Alistair must have borrowed it from someone. Nomadic vampires didn't put down roots and buy houses; they would usually just stop where they needed to and move on. There was a gentle light coming from the house; not that vampires needed lights to do anything but it made things seem more normal. Everyone turned to Dad. Beside me Jake phased back into his human form and lifted the rucksack off my back to claim his clothes.

"Edward?" Said Will. "What are you getting?"

"He's reading., relaxing even. He's very contented."

"He's not thinking about what he's _done_?" Will was accusatory.

"He's not done anything as far as we know; chances are he had nothing to do with Jess and Mary's deaths. We could go there are find that it's the first he's heard of it. We have to go on what we know and that's only him being seen at Mary's house, nothing else. Don't accuse him of anything; I don't want him shutting down before we've got satisfactory answers. Ok, let's pretend to be a group of lost hikers and get him to open the door. Will, how's your British accent coming along?"

"Not bad." Will said in passable northern English.

"It's time for you to try it out for real."

"W-W-J-D."

Jake scoffed. "Not going all closet Christian on us are you Will?"

"No, it stands for What Would Jess Do."

"Jess? Does that mean we should shout something British and rousing such as 'Cry 'God for Harry, England and St George'"

"Jake, Jess didn't go around quoting Shakespeare." I laughed. "She hated it."

"She hated Shakespeare? Is that allowed among British people?" Jake was trying to lighten the mood.

"You know what I think she'd say if she were here now?" Dad said.

Will laughed. "I'll say it, save you the embarrassment of swearing in front of your daughter."

"What, you mean _again_?" Jake interjected. We all chuckled and looked to Will.

"If my girl were here now." The love he had for her was so clear on his face. "She'd take a huge breath in, huff it out impatiently and yell, in the loudest possible voice; 'What the fuck are we doing standing around outside in this weather!'" And with that, Will strode off down the road, the rest of us following him, pretending to be a lost group of hikers.

We crunched our way down the gravel drive. Jake took my hand as we reached the dark wooden door and Will rapped his knuckles on it. Inside I could hear the closing of a book and the quiet quick steps of a nimble vampire. Bolts were drawn back and the heavy wooden door was pulled open. The door clearly hadn't read the script, it didn't squeak.

"Hello Alistair." Said Dad. "We were just passing. May we come in?"

Alistair regarded the five of us as if he'd trodden in something unpleasant. That he detested company of any sort was evident, but to have to endure the company of _five_ people was beyond awful. Alistair had made no attempt to blend in and wore an outfit more suitable to a Victorian social gathering, rather than the twenty first century.

Alistair spoke to my Dad, looking at no one else. "I don't want to be introduced. I know who _yo_u are and that half wolf thing that came in with you. Frankly that's enough."

"You also know my daughter, Renesmee."

Alistair looked to me briefly and then gave a little huff of disdain. "It grew up normally then."

"It?" Jake almost growled. "Yes _she_ did."

"Alistair ignored him. "And how is Carlisle?"

"He's very well. He's in Italy now, working to help those who would like to try our way of life."

"The fool." He flicked his eyes to Will. "I see there are others who have embarked on this folly. Another one of your students, Mr Cullen?"

"No, Will was inspired by us, but made the change independently."

"So, to what do I owe this pleasure? Is there a reason for your visit or are you merely using this as a glorified drying room until the rain stops?"

"Yes, there is a reason. I am curious why you have been making visits to Mary Burton in Grasmere."

"I don't know a Mary Burton in Grasmere."

"Edward?" Asked Will.

"You don't know her as Mary Burton, but the woman I can see you are thinking of is the woman I mean.

"Rana?"

"What?" A burst of laughter escaped from Jake's mouth. "Are we really talking about the same person?"

"Rana helps me." Alistair snapped. Dad glared at Jake, making fun of him wouldn't help.

"Why does Rana help you Alistair?"

It was Alistair's turn to do the glaring. "I don't think that is any of your business."

"Ordinarily it wouldn't be, but we are trying to unravel a mystery. You have been seen by a human at Rana's house."

"Have I?" Alistair seemed unconcerned. "That must be nice for them."

"When did you last see Rana?"

"I was last there in October."

"And you've not seen her since."

"No."

"When are you planning to see her again?"

Alistair shook his head. "I don't know, I don't have any specific plans to see her at the moment."

"That's probably just as well then. Alistair, this is going to be difficult news for me to pass on, but I'm afraid Rana's dead."

The shock on Alistair's face gave heartbreaking evidence to Dad's assertion that Alistair had nothing to do with the explosion. I had foolishly allowed myself a grain of hope that Jess had gone down fighting him off and that Will would rip Alistair into a million pieces seeking justice for his mate's death. I wanted to make someone hurt for Jess's death too. Now it really was just down to a faulty gas stove.

We trooped back out into the night and as we started back down the drive of the house Dad pulled me to him, knowing that it wasn't just raindrops that were trickling down my face. We walked silently on, trudging down the road we had once walked up. Dad let me go to Jake and caught up to Will, placing a hand on his shoulder and walking with him.

I must have mentally zoned out because I nearly walked into the back of Will when he stopped dead in the road.

"Edward?" It wasn't Will that had stopped dead, it was Dad.

"_That's_ what's wrong. He's too contented!"

"You're picking someone up for being too happy?" Queried Jake.

"Yes! Demetri, what's the thing you think about the most?"

"Blood."

"Will?"

"Jess and Ben, but before they came along, blood."

"Likewise." Dad added. "Before Bella it was always there, running in the background regardless of what I was doing. When do you not think of blood, Will?"

"For a short amount of time after I've hunted."

"Yes. I've been coming back to it again and again since we left Alistair that his eyes are not the scarlet of the recently hunted, but yet he's not thinking about blood. That's unheard of. That's… wrong."

"You mean he's not thinking about where his next meal's coming from?" Demetri's brow was deeply furrowed.

"No."

"That is not _possible_." Demetri was incredulous.

"He's got someone all lined up?" Suggested Jake.

"No," Dad shook his head.

Demetri turned to Jake. "If he had someone lined up, he'd have to hunt, he couldn't think about them and leave them untouched."

"Has he got a fridge full of donated blood?" I offered. Knowing that that's what had preoccupied me when Jess was pregnant; the knowledge that there was an entire stash of it in the house, had driven me to distraction.

"Will, don't get your hopes up, but Demetri, I want you to search for Jess."

We focussed on Demetri as he closed his eyes to catch the flavour of Jess's mind from those of us who knew her. They flew open again and Demetri stared in a confused state at Will.

"I have no idea how you mated with her. That's like loving a…"

"Tiger?" Will supplied.

"Yes."

"Have you found her?"

Demetri shook his head. "No, I was just getting her mind. She's… weird. Let me try again."

Demetri fell silent for several minutes.

"What's he looking for?" Will eventually asked my Dad.

"He's looking for essentially an echo of Jess's mind. He's sending out the sense of her mind and he's looking for answering echo, for the same thing coming back. It looks a bit like a pinprick of light in a dark sky."

Demetri remained motionless with his eyes closed.

"What's that? Dad suddenly broke the intense silence. He walked over to Demetri. My heart was in my mouth.

"I'm focussing." Demetri said quietly. The next twelve seconds were the longest of my life. Jake wrapped his arms around me; Will gravitated over to Demetri and Dad, who both gave a gasp of joy at the same.

"That's her!" Dad exclaimed. "But she's so far away."

"She's not far away." Demetri was grave. "She's close; she's just not very alive."

Will set off at speed; running back down to the farmhouse. Dad set off after him.

"Don't kill him! We need to know exactly where she is."

"Oh don't worry about that; he's going to lead us right to her!"


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen: The Gift**

Alistair really wasn't needed, we could have found Jess without him, but there was no way that Will was going to let him get away if he'd hurt her. We headed north once again, turning west when we reached the hamlet of Mosedale and into the valley of the River Caldew. It was as remote a place as I'd ever seen and in this wind and rain, one of the most inhospitable.

Demetri's mind and Alistair's reluctant guiding brought us to a deserted and ramshackle house. The roof was caved in, the chimney had collapsed and not one of the windows was left intact. Going in to it did not give me any scent of Jess, but Demetri took the lead, walking over to a corner, bending down and pulling up a flagstone.

"She's down there."

Will did not need further prompting; he grabbed Alistair by the scruff of his neck and threw him down into the cellar. We all followed and down here I could smell Jess.

I looked around but couldn't see her; it was Dad who strode off into a far corner to what looked like a pile of rags in a heap of hay. Will bolted past him.

"Jess!" he called. Up came a grubby dishevelled blonde head. Yes! It was her and she was alive. My heart almost exploded with joy. It was my head however that crashed into confusion when Jess scrabbled backwards in abject fear and from behind the length of black tape stuck across her mouth tried to scream. The closer Will got the more she screamed. She started to cry and tried frantically to get away. But she was exhausted, weak and the chink of chain alerted us to another horror – she was shackled to the wall. She could get no further away and collapsed back into the hay.

Will spun around, to face Alistair. Dad too closed in. Jake appeared behind him while I looked in horror at the twitching pile of rags in the hay that was Jess.

"_What_ have you done to her?" Will spat each word out.

"She is _mine_, she is my gift from Rana."

"Your _gift_? I don't think so, that's my _mate_! Edward help me to understand what the hell he's talking about."

"Mary gave Jess to him."

"What?" Everyone said it in unison.

"No, surely you don't give your own grand daughter to a vampire?" Said Jake "what kind of sick woman was she?"

"Rana gave her to her because somebody took my Susannah away from me!"

"Enough with the Rana thing, her name is Mary!" Jake shouted.

"It's his name for her." Said Dad. "Rana in Arabic means 'mesmerising'. Her eyes, it's always the eyes."

"Stop with the nice little names." Will's voice was cold and hard. "What have you done to Jess to produce that reaction in her? If you have…" Will couldn't get the words out. "If you have… hurt her, so help me I will grind you to dust and burn you in the heart of the sun!"

Alistair said nothing.

"Tell him!" My Dad's shout made even Jess, curled up on a foetal position in the straw, jump. I inched closer trying not to scare her. She was almost blue from the cold and she was not wearing any of her own clothes. She was bare-legged in a short denim mini skirt, a peach-coloured top and a black zip up jacket. She moved and something caught my attention on the back of her hand.

A cannula.

That's why he was so content; he had human blood on tap. Any time he wanted it he could have some and instead of going to all the bother of having to go out and kill, the human made an endless supply, just as long as he could keep the human alive. It looked like he hadn't quite got the hang of keeping a human healthy.

"He's feeding from Jess!" Came Dad's sickened voice. "He's put a line into the back of her hand. That's why she's so weak; blood loss!"

I wasn't looking, I was keeping an eye on Jess, but the grunts and thumps were enough to know that people behind me were fighting. The noise aroused Jess and again a weak little head came up. Her eyes looked unfocussed but she looked at me. I smiled warmly at her. Again came the attempted screaming and the backing away. I backed away too to try and show her that I was no threat. What had he done to her to make her react like this to us? I turned and found that Alistair and Will were locked together brawling. They were twisting and turning at vampire speed, there would be no way Jess would see them.

Jake came over and knelt down in the hay next to me. Jess had slumped back down into it again, exhausted and from her shoulders, silently sobbing. I grabbed Jake and pressed myself to him, sobbing too for being powerless to help my friend. The bottom half of Alistair's arm went whizzing overhead and smacked into the wall of the house, making a dent.

""Will, stop!" Shouted my Dad. "Before you tear him to pieces we haven't had all the answers to this and it's making things with Jess worse."

The fighting stopped.

"First things first, we need to care for Jess. Demetri, restrain Alistair as best you can. Keep him well away from her."

With Demetri dragging Alistair back, the four of us lined up, kneeling in the hay several yards back from where Jess was lying, curled once again into a foetal position.

"Jess. It's Edward. Will, Ness, Jake and I are here to help you and take you home. I know you're scared of us, but I promise you that none of us is going to hurt you. First of all we'd like to make you more comfortable by getting you out of those shackles. One of us will come over take them off and then come back. Who would you like to do that? Will, Ness, Jake or myself. You don't need to speak, just choose the person in your head that you'd like to come over to you."

There was no movement from Jess and we were all silent, looking to Dad.

"Ok, Jake will come over." Jake crawled slowly over to where Jess was lying.

Will looked anxiously to Dad. "What's going on in her head?"

"She witnessed Alistair killing Mary and another girl. All she can see is the traditional type of vampire. This isn't a problem with you, just what you are. Jake is the least threatening. She knows he doesn't eat people. She's also confused because she has hypothermia."

Jess didn't move as Jake pulled the metal cuffs off her wrists and ankles. Jess tried to bring her hands up to her face but she was too weak and cold and couldn't make a finger and thumb pinch hard enough to lift the end of the tape over her mouth.

"Do you want me to do that for you?" Jake asked her. From the recesses of the hay I saw her head nod slightly. Jake lifted the corner for her. She tried to pull it again and still struggled. Jake helped her and together they slowly peeled back the tape from her mouth. "Better?"

Jess nodded.

"I'll go back over there now."

Jake started to crawl back but Dad stopped him.

"Go back Jake; she doesn't want you to go."

Jake went over to Jess and sat by her.

Dad turned back to Demetri and Alistair. "Ok Alistair, next question. Who did Mr and Mrs Taylor cremate, thinking it was their daughter?"

What emerged was the most cold and calculating picture on both the side of Mary Burton and Alistair. Mary had become fascinated with Alistair and Alistair too had become rather attracted to Mary when she was young. It was a familiar tale of her eyes drawing him in and him being mesmerised by her. For that he had given her a pet name of Rana and over the course of forty years he had made increasingly frequent calls on her. They talked; he shared his love and his loss of Susannah, initially touched when she named her own daughter Susannah in honour of his dead love. Alistair was distrustful of everyone, but in Rana he found someone he could make a small connection with. He never stayed long, finding it difficult to control the twin desires of wanting to talk to her and wanting to kill her.

And then Rana started talking about Jess and how similar she was to the drawing of Susannah. More and more she emphasised that Jess was so like his dead love and that she was obsessed with vampires. And then Jess moved to America and Mary was annoyed by her daughter's decision to take Jess away. It was then that Mary seemed to lose all sense of reason, sensing that the loss of Jess would mean the loss of Alistair. His visits became all about her planning to give Jess to him.

Initially, Mary had planned she could hand Jess over in the summer, but something had happened and Jess had stayed behind. The elaborate preparations that had been gone to, were needless. But soon there were plans for a Christmas visit. When he met with Rana in the October, they planned for him to come and claim his gift at Christmas, Mary would make sure Jess was there this time.

He had made his own preparations, picking a young prostitute to match Jess's height, weight and looks and bringing her to the house. Initially he was smitten; Jess was visually the living incarnation of his Susannah! Rana was anxious for him to have her, but Jess was not having that. This was not his Susannah, she was… Here Alistair faltered in his tale and a callous chuckle came from Will.

"You wanted a little kitten and you walked into a room with a sabre-toothed tiger. Jess wouldn't go quietly anywhere she didn't want to. That's why you had to stop up her mouth with tape. The human girl fought you as best she could, she knew exactly what you were and she didn't fall at your feet in adoration, did she?"

"No. It was then that I realised that we had gone beyond the point of no return. I could not let her go, knowing what was happening, who she was linked to and her direct line to the Volturi. Where is Jane by the way?"

"Hopefully looking after her husband." Said Will. We could only hope that was true in the best sense and that she wasn't stealing him away having started the conversion or stealing him away having accidentally killed him.

"What happened was regrettable. Your mate knew too much about me and what I was doing, the girl was disposable anyway and Rana… Rana now knew too much about her grand daughter's new life and too much about what I was capable of, to live.

"In the end I made a choice. I thought, in time that your mate would come to love me as Susannah had done. I killed both Rana and the girl, forced your mate to swap everything she was wearing with the girl and brought her here. I hoped very much that I had cleared up after myself not to alert you to my presence."

"And you would have, had it not been for a girl who simply looked out of her bedroom window occasionally."

"Of you I was most fearful, Mr Cullen. I have worked very diligently to keep my thoughts neutral, focussing solely on being content and happy."

"That was your undoing. You were no such joy the first time we met."

"And I will be no such joy again. I understand that Jess is the last of Susannah's line and there will be no more."

"No."

Alistair turned to Will. "I am profoundly sorry for stealing your mate. I promise you that, apart from putting the cannula in the back of her hand I have not physically injured her. She has had food and water, although the food seems to have run off."

"Run off?" Will said sarcastically.

"Yes, I put a sheep in here."

"Alive?"

"Yes. Humans eat sheep don't they?"

"They like them killed, skinned and cooked first. Jess wouldn't be able to do anything with that. So are you telling me that she's had nothing to eat for seven days, has got no warm clothing, has had only cold water and you've been draining her blood? I'm amazed she could even get up to scramble away from me." Will looked over to where Jess still lay unmoving in the hay. "You may not have harmed her physically, but it looks like you've messed up her head. Plus you've now made it impossible for her to go back to her family, so I hope, in time she starts to like vampires again, because we're all she's got. How is she Jake?"

"Awake, just."

"Edward?" Will turned to my Dad.

"Very weak, we need to get her out of here."

"What do you think I should do?"

"It's your call."

"Leave him to think about what he's done." I said. "He's exposed himself to the wrath of Jess." I looked Alistair squarely in the face. "If I were you, I'd start running."

"She's only a human." Alistair scoffed.

"She has a vampire mate, who says she won't be your equal one day? As I said, start running, because if she doesn't get you, then I will."

"You and whose army, little girl?"

"You really don't want to use that line on me. The last person who said that came to a sad end." I got up, walked over to where Alistair's arm lay twitching, picked it up and tossed it back to him. He reconnected it to himself.

"Don't mess with my family or next time, we'll send Jane to get back what you take."

"I haven't had the pleasure of meeting Jane."

"Oh believe me, the pleasure will be all hers." Said Demetri. "I can't wait to see how she reacts to finding out what you did to her sister in law. I'm with Ness; start running."

Alistair seemed to take the hint as one by one, Demetri, myself, Will, Dad and Jake stood up. Alistair backed away from us, darted out of the cellar trap and into the night.

Jake slunk back to his knees. "Jess? We need to move you. Would you let somebody carry you?" I watched for the tiny affirmative nod from her head. "I can't keep up with these guys as a human and I don't think you're strong enough to hold on to my fur. Can Will carry you?" It was a full ten seconds before Jess answered. It was a yes.

As he walked towards her, Will pulled off a couple of layers of clothing. He knelt down by her and Jess started back a little, but there was no screaming. Jake worked the t shirt and sweater over her head, donating his own sweater, pants and waterproof jacket that he wouldn't need. He gently wrapped Jess up like a Gore-Tex burrito and Will lifted her into his arms, cradling her as he had done Ben as a baby.

We exited the cellar and all stood close to the doorway of the dilapidated house. Jake phased back into a wolf and I checked my watch. I'd need to be back in the house in less than forty five minutes, I'd have to run fast. I looked over to Jess, lying in Will's arms. He was looking down at her almost like he was cradling a child again.

"She can barely keep her eyes open." He smiled. "It's going to be a long haul, but I'll do everything I can to get her back to full health."

Dad chuckled. "Oh she'll be fine."

"I'm glad you're so confident." Will replied.

"I was just laughing at Jess's comment."

"I didn't hear her say anything."

"She said it in her head."

"What did she say?"

"She doesn't want lamb again, ever."

From the depths of the jacket burrito came a very small and croaky voice. "You edited that."

"My Dad used his annual profanity already." I said. "He can't swear for the rest of the year."

"I may do if we get back and find Jane's caused more havoc. Come on, let's go!"

Off we ran out into the night. Dad peeled off to the hospital in Carlisle to steal replacement blood for Jess, the quickest way to help her replace what was lost. The rest of us headed straight back to Grasmere.

I was cutting it fine but I couldn't rest without seeing Dan. I stripped off my wet clothes, wrapped my bathrobe around me and poked my head around his bedroom door. He was thankfully sleeping peacefully and was that a small smile on his face? I could give him a bigger one tomorrow with our news. I crept back into my room just as Susie emerged from her room.

"Oh, you're up already. You don't look like you've slept." Susie said.

I shook my head. "No, not a great night."

"Me either. I'm looking forward to going home though."

"Me too."

"Look Ness, I'm sorry for snapping at you the other day. It's none of my business who you go out with. I just don't want Dan hurt."

"I'd never hurt him, but I don't think Dan's all that interested in me. I don't think I'm his type."

Susie grinned. "What's his type?"

"I think he's into blondes."

Susie gave a chuckle. "So, you and Jake Black huh?"

I looked a little sheepish. "Perhaps, I'm still skirting around the edges. What do you think?"

"I wouldn't say no." Susie's eyes flashed wickedly and I fought the urge to bite off her head. Back in the bedroom my phone beeped.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen: Parting of the Ways**

"Just give me a minute, Ness." Dan exhaled through his teeth, as if he were trying to stop himself being sick. He leaned back against the wall and slowly sunk down onto the floor. He was a wreck; physically and emotionally pulverised by the last few weeks. Was I really surprised that he was struggling with such a simple task as walking?

"I don't want to go." He snapped. "I can't face them."

I knelt down in front of him. "It's important that you go." I said softly. "You need this opportunity to say goodbye." He looked at me with bewildered eyes. He had good days and bad days and this was a bad day. But I had to get him there, everyone was waiting for him.

"Why did it all go so catastrophically wrong? What did I do?"

I sighed, it was his endless question these days and one I couldn't give him an answer to.

"You didn't do anything and you know that. Look, you're going to have to walk, or I'll have to carry you and there are people about."

He begrudgingly complied and held out his hand. I pulled him to his feet and his arm gripped me tightly around my waist. As we walked across the school yard, people stared at us. Let them stare! After what he'd been through; getting a little help walking over to a car was to be expected and they didn't even know the half of it. You didn't lose what he'd lost and instantly snap back into happy mode. I helped him into the passenger seat, got into the driver's side and exited the parking lot. Although it had brightened up into a sunny afternoon, my wheels skidded slightly on the snow that had fallen that morning.

We arrived at the house, Emmett was there to help Dan out of the car and Dan's feet barely touched the ground as my uncle almost dragged him up the stairs and into the house.

The last six weeks had been hard on everyone and there was good reason for that. To the outside world we had returned to Forks without Jess. It was tough, going through everyone else's grief, when all you wanted to do was to comfort them and tell them she really was doing much better these days. She was still extremely tired but being sensible and resting a lot.

Jess was now firmly out of the human world and both Dan and I had to get used to this new reality. There was a memorial service at school which was the oddest thing to attend, especially when I arrived at the house later and found the subject of the memorial service looking very much alive, pink cheeked for the first time in weeks and playing on the games console with her son.

As I expected, Heather was amazing and did what she did best, being supportive, encouraging and was there, even at 3am when Susie couldn't sleep or was too distressed for even Brian to be able to cope with. Heather was there for her in a way that none of the rest of us could be. She was truly an angel and Grampa was every day falling even more in love with her.

Although Jess took longer to heal physically, mentally she managed to straighten herself out fairly quickly, once she'd been on the receiving end of some food, a bath, a sleep and some warm, dry clothes. The reason of what she'd known and experienced for over a year re-asserted itself over the terrible events of those few days. Not all vampires were out to keep you captive and milk you for your blood; just as not all humans would willingly give their own grand-daughter away. Alistair's behaviour was in some ways understandable. Mary's was downright shocking and something that Jess was confused and angry about. At best Jess found it unbelievably stupid, at worst she imagined herself having being 'groomed' for years, so that when she met Alistair she'd go willingly to him.

"Her eternal life crap really was true, but not her for. She wanted it for me, but not the way everybody thought she did." Jess shook her head still bewildered by what had gone on.

But although there was good news about Jess's progress, we were not a happy family. There was no happy ending for Dan and Jane.

Jane had gone back to Grasmere that night; yes to see Dan, but not to be reunited with him or to covert him, just to leave a letter and her wedding ring on the bedside table. She took nothing and vanished into the night.

So what everyone thought was grief in Dan and spontaneous tears over the loss of his sister was not that at all. They were over the loss of his wife and he had one simple question that he repeated over and over again:

"Why?"

It was a question all of us were asking.

Alice did her best, trying to track her down by her decisions, but it became too hard.

"She can't even decide on what to wear, let alone what her life plans are." Alice got tetchy when Dan asked her to stop trying to keep tabs on Jane. "She's my sister." Alice snapped. "I can't just forget about her!"

"Well try!" Dan had yelled and stormed outside.

But things became horribly real in mid-January when Jane's plans did solidify and Lombardi arrived at the house.

The Volturi's lawyer arrived with divorce papers; something he'd never prepared before and was completely unsure of how divorce law worked. That caused the mother of all rows, with everyone up in arms and Dan sat in the middle of it at the dining table with the thick stack of papers in front of him. He looked even more bewildered than it was possible for him to be. The actual divorce papers constituted a very small part of the stack, the rest were an agreement to buy Dan's total and life-long silence about the existence of vampires. In return for his silence, the Volturi would make sure that he was generously financially provided for, for the rest of his life.

Dan pulled aside the divorce document and signed the one buying his silence. He pushed it back across the table and pulled the divorce papers back to him.

"I need more time on this one. Can I post them back to you?"

"I think that's the least you can give him." Said Jasper, who seemed to be taking all this incredibly personally.

"As long as they are back with us by the end of the week, I see no reason why not. We have the more important of the two documents signed and the bank will be in touch with you about the money."

"I don't want the money; I just want you to leave me the fuck alone." Dan said tersely.

"I can assure you that the only contact with our organisation will be through the bank. No one else will contact you."

"Organisation? That's a curious word to use of the Volturi." Said Rose.

Lombardi looked over to her and a swell of pride visibly filled him.

"Things are very different, changes are being made. The Volturi are moving with the times and adopting a more corporate approach to doing business."

"This is Sulpicia and Athenodora's work?" Dad asked.

"Yes! For the first time in a long time we have some… I don't know really what to call it, team spirit? Anyway, these are exciting times!"

Jane was back with the Volturi and formally severed all connection with Dan and with us. Her letter to him had spoken of it being too great a thing to deny what she truly was and she could no longer lie to herself that she was anything other than a traditional vampire. As January drew to a close, Alice noted with sadness that Jane's individuality was once again being subsumed into the corporate identity of what Alice sarcastically called 'Team Volturi.'

Carlisle and Esmé, living in Tuscany and now running a facility where vampires who wanted to try the alternate lifestyle could go, went to see Jane. She met with them briefly, politely but was adamant that her decision was final.

"I hardly recognised her". Was Esmé's comment as she spoke to us over the internet one evening. "She wasn't the Jane of before and not the Jane we'd come to know. That place is odd, too. Not that I liked it before, but I like it even less now. It's like a machine."

While one twin's life was in tatters, the other's was ready to move on and that's why I had brought Dan over today. Jess was going to Denali with Will and Ben. Staying around Forks really wasn't an option and it was making her sad being so close to her parents without being able to interact with them. Today, Jess and Dan would be saying goodbye.

Suitcases were lined up in the hallway and Jasper was loading them into Will's new car, it was something huge and big for life in Alaska. Emmett very much approved and was considering getting one himself. Jess had brought only one thing from her old life, Will's signet ring that Dan had stolen back for her. Alice was more than equal to the task of making sure that everything other items of jewellery and clothing had gotten replaced.

Dan was slumped in an armchair in the living room, radiating his usual desire to be alone these days. It was almost tangible, as if he was surrounded by a natural repellent. Everyone knew to avoid him. Apart from Esmé and Carlisle, the rest of the family were here and one by one they arrived to congregate in the hall.

I thought about my life and how different things would be for me, now that I didn't really have much of an ally in the human world. Dan was increasingly distant and I'd have to go out and make a new friend. There wasn't really an obvious candidate for that position, Jess having completely filled it on day one. Replacing Jess would be impossible. Did I want to try? I didn't think so. Besides, she was still my friend, we still had every other form of communication open to us, just not face to face. I already had tickets booked to Denali for Spring Break and it would only be a few weeks before I'd see her again.

Mom came over. She put her arms around me and cuddled in to her.

"Don't think of this as losing a friend. She's one of us now, you've gained a sister."

"Yeah, I know. I'd rather she was here though, then we could still hang out together."

"You know why that's going to be difficult for her."

"Yeah."

"And there's another reason. I'm sorry, but it was her idea that we keep this from you. She didn't want you to worry about her."

Well of course I was instantly worried. "What? What's the matter, did her stomach flu get worse?"

"Oh no, that's cleared up now, she's fine." Mom was having a hard time keeping a straight face.

"Why are you laughing?"

Mom's eyes kept flicking to something behind me and I turned to see what it was, expecting Emmett to be hanging off the light fitting or something. What my eyes found caused me to gasp in astonishment and I span fully round to take it all in.

There, stood in a shaft of sunlight was Jess and these were no sparkles from some body crème she'd used, these were in-the-skin sparkles, these were vampire skin sparkles!

A bubble of shocked laughter escaped me as around the room, my family who were all in on it smiled their approval on the newest Cullen vampire.

"What do you think?" Jess held out her arms in a pose as if showing off a new outfit. She was incredible to look at; every inch of her was perfected and defined. She was Jess but even more beautiful! Will came to stand by her side and Ben launched himself onto her, landing lightly on her back. Usually, when Ben did that there was a protesting and buckling 'oof!' from Jess. Not this time, she was rock solid.

"You look amazing." I whispered. "How do you feel?"

"Incredible!" Her voice had a smoother, more resonant quality to it. She was in possession of all the faculties that made vampires attractive to their prey.

"How was it?"

She wrinkled her nose. "Excruciatingly awful; but Will was there the entire time."

"And how did you…?" We'd talked about how it might happen once the time came. Would she go the traditional method and let Will bite her, or take away the risk of him not managing to stop and do it more clinically, with his venom in a syringe.

"Bite, with Emmett standing by just to make sure he released."

"So this was stomach flu?"

She nodded. "Sorry, but I didn't want you to worry."

I pulled a face but she was right, I would have worried and spent her entire conversion process wearing a groove into the floor.

"Where were you?"

"At the cottage. In your bed."

"It's hardly my bed anymore; I rarely get to sleep in it."

"Well you'll need a new one. I trashed it." She grinned and stuck out her tongue cheekily at me. "Oh, and there's more."

"We have another talented vampire." Said Jasper, radiating intense pride in his daughter-in-law to be.

Jess looked at me intensely and suddenly she was right there in front of me, only inches from my face.

"Wow! You can move really fast, I didn't see you!"

There was a wave of laughter from around the room.

"Er… Ness, you might want to look where you are." Jasper snickered. I looked around and discovered that I was the one who had moved.

"Holy shit! What's that?" I laughed.

"I can bring people to me with my eyes." Jess grinned.

"We don't know if it works on humans yet." Cautioned Will, "Although now's not the time to be experimenting. But it certainly works on vampires and hybrids."

I laughed. "You're even more of a walking vampire magnet now? I love it!"

"Absolutely!" Will snaked his arms around Jess. "It just magnified her natural ability." Will's attentions set off something in Jess that she wanted to obey. He laughed and tried to disengage from her. But she was stronger than he was and held him to her. "Er… Jess? We need to go, now's not the right time."

"It's always the right time."

"Not in public."

"Never seems to bother Emmett and Rose."

"It bothers me." Said a gruff, unhappy voice.

Dan had ambled out of the living room. I turned to him and behind me everyone closed in to make sure that Jess did not attack her brother. Dan shoved his hands in his pockets throwing quick glances at Jess. "So you're a vampire now?"

"Yes."

"Good luck with that."

"I'm really sorry it's not worked out for you."

"Yeah, well… I'll live."

"Look after Mum and Dad for me."

Dan shrugged. "They'll be fine."

Jess's radiant happiness was at clashing odds with her brother's moroseness.

"I'll keep in touch, I'll email you."

"Yeah." It sounded like he didn't want that. "Look… um… I don't like goodbyes but I feel that I need to say this, to all of you. I want to say thanks, for trying to sort things out between me and Jane. But she's made her decision and so I've got to move on and make a new life for myself, or whatever the psychological bollocks is that you need to do after a divorce.

"It's going to be easier if I'm not part of this family. Coming here reminds me too much of things I'd rather not think about. I need to remain firmly in the human world, self-preservation and all that.

"I was thinking about what Fiona said at Christmas, that my life was an average length and she saw two kids in it. I laughed at the time, but now I know that she was telling the truth. Somewhere out there is a human girl with whom I'm going to have two kids. So I'd better go and find her. With all due respect I'm not going to find that here. So, take care of yourselves." He moved towards the door. "I'll walk back."

"You can't do that you twonk, it's three and a half miles!" Jess snapped.

"Yes I can, I've got feet, I can walk."

"I'll drop you back." Said Daniel. "I'm going over to see Stephanie anyway." Daniel kissed Jess on the cheek and said goodbye to Will and Ben. "See you in few weeks."

"So how's it going with the wonderful Miss Chambers?" Asked Rose.

"She's been wearing the pendant he gave her for Christmas." I answered, having watched my teacher play with it, her mind clearly on more interesting things than getting twenty four twelfth-grade students through their finals this year.

Daniel raised his eyebrows and gave a little shrug of his shoulders. "It's early days, I'm not rushing it." But I caught something in his eye, a look to Dad that made me wonder whether everything was alright. There were certainly tensions and unexplained things happening, but Dad had told me not to worry about it.

"Perhaps that's where I went wrong." Dan said plaintively. Daniel put a hand on Dan's shoulder. Daniel felt just as bad about the contrasts between them. They shared the same name but the sun was in the ascendant in Daniel's relationship, whereas it had sunk out of sight in Dan's.

Dan gave a cursory goodbye to everyone and left. Sadness descended over us.

"I tell you, if I ever see Jane again I am going to... I don't know why she didn't kill him! It would have been kinder than this living hell she's dumped him in!"

"I can see the sense in disconnecting himself from us." Said Rose, "But I still feel he's part of our family."

"He is for me too." Said Dad. "Even if he doesn't want to spend time with us, it doesn't mean that we won't look out for him. Jess you know that our promises to your family stand, regardless."

Jess nodded, clearly emotional even though she could no longer cry.

A few minutes later, Jess, Will and Ben drove away from the house to start their new lives in Alaska where Jess could learn to be a vampire. Everyone melted away, leaving me sat on the steps and glad to be alone with my thoughts for a while.

Tomorrow at school would be a new day. I would be out of there in four short months, all I needed to do was get my head down and put in some study. Maybe getting a new human friend was a bad idea; it hadn't worked out great for the first two. There was the band, we had Karl on keyboards now and through that I'd still see Dan. Maybe in time things would heal and we could be closer friends again.

I dropped by the Diner on the way home, to pick up some hot chocolate. Although the sky was clear now and the February sun was doing its best to warm the world, it was still very cold and the chocolate would be a nice thing to have.

I stood in the line and checked my phone messages. Demetri had sent me an email, thanking me for the latest MP3 files of our band's stuff I'd sent over to him. He had some lovely news to share. He had proposed to the vampire girl he'd met in France and she'd said yes. Trine was Norwegian by birth and the pair of them had now got jobs working for the Volturi. They had been telling people about us and had created the amusing Italian spike in the breakdown of our website visitors.

"I can't begin to imagine why we're big in Italy." Zak had scratched his head on that one. I'd just chuckled to myself.

I daydreamed, imagining the warmth and sun of Tuscany. I turned over the possibility of asking Mom and Dad if we could go spend some time at Esmé and Carlisle's villa this summer. Perhaps we could go after graduation, take Jake with us, hang out, have fun and get some sun. Jake looked even more incredible with a tan.

"Hello Ness."

I turned and Jake was standing right behind me, not in swim shorts and sun oil, but in overalls and covered in grease. He made even that look hot.

"Hi." I said sadly. I had to remember to be sad. I thought of Dan and it was easy.

"Rough times, huh? I was sorry to hear about Jess."

"Thanks. How are you?"

"Not bad."

"How's your Dad?"

Jake smiled. "Up to his eyes in wedding preparations."

"When is it?"

"May twenty eighth. Invitations will be going out shortly; look out for yours and Charlie's."

I forced a weak smile.

"Hey and I'm building a house, you should come by sometime, check it out."

"Where's that?"

"I've bought a plot of land in the forest, on the edge of the reservation. Foundations are in and it's starting to go up now."

Our house, another secret I had to keep, but I was really excited about that and my future with Jake.

"Yeah, we'll do that." I was hiding my enthusiasm well.

"I…um… Have a few minutes, do you want to drink that here? We should catch up... It's been ages since I've seen you, a lot's happened."

"Yes, I'd like that." I said, cluing in to the thrill of what was happening here and also thinking of the last time I'd seen him - this morning as he'd left my bed after one of our occasional nights together - ducking out the window before it was light.

And there, sat on stools in Frederick's Diner; Vanessa Masen noticed what a great guy Jacob Black was. He was friendly and happy; something that she needed right now and there was the added bonus of him being quite good looking. No, scrap that; _incredibly_ good looking. How had she never noticed him before?

Of course, I should have seen this. Why had I even wondered about where my next friend would come from? Perfectly timed, Jake was always exactly what I needed exactly when I needed him; whether I was Vanessa or Renesmee. In the diner that afternoon he was just a friend. But away from the human world, in a world where we roamed the peninsula together as bonded vampire and wolf and where we were secretly building a house and a life together, he was my anchor, my rock, my destiny, my desire, my love and my life.

He was also incredibly good in bed.

…Better make that two hundred and forty _eight_ text messages.

**The End**


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